John Aiken married his wife 17 years ago. It began under tragic circumstances.

While we all know John Aiken for dishing out relationship advice on Married at First Sight, little is known about his own marriage to Kelly Swanson-Roe. 

The track-record for couples lasting on MAFS is pretty… dire… but John has been married to his wife for 17 years.

This week, John celebrated Kelly's 50 birthday. "Happy 50th to this amazing woman! I've loved watching you shine Kels over the past 20 years. Always in love," he wrote to his wife.

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A post shared by John Aiken (@johnaikenlive)

But the story of the pair meeting came from tragic circumstances. Swanson-Roe lost her first husband, Jon Roe, when he was killed — along with 20 others — at the age of 30 in a canyoning accident in Switzerland. 

The couple had only been married for three years.

Swanson-Roe, who was 24 years old when her husband passed away, is a former journalist and TV presenter — it was on television that Aiken first saw her.

When the pair met, Swanson-Roe was still grieving from her loss. Aiken revealed in an interview with 9Honey, that when their romance began, he decided to "embrace" her heartbreaking past.

"Rather than saying, 'No, I need to be separate with Kelly,' I just said, I’m going to bring her past partner into the relationship and really make him a part of it all.'

"And that really changed everything."

The couple have been married for 17 years and have lived in Australia for over a decade.

"She is a very resilient woman and quite inspiring to be around," the MAFS expert told 9Honey, describing his wife as "someone who I look up to and who I have a lot of respect for."

 

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10 years ago this week we left everything behind in NZ and took the plunge in Aust! It’s been an amazing and scary ride, and I’m so grateful to have shared it all with this special woman. Thanks for chasing dreams with me Kels! #takingrisks #chasingdreams #noregrets

A post shared by  John Aiken (@johnaikenlive) on Jul 5, 2018 at 7:00pm PDT

In 2018, the former journalist paid tribute to her late husband, 19 years after he passed away, alongside a throwback photo of the two.

"19 years gone today my Jonny Roe…" she said in her caption. "But still crystal clear in my memory is the warmth, kindness, humour and intelligence of that beautiful soul of yours. To the world you were just someone, but to me you were the world."

This year, on the 24th anniversary, she dedicated an emotional post to Johnny following the death of her father, Chas.

"24 years of toasting one of the brightest stars in my sky…Dad's been speaking about reuniting with you for a long, long time. I can only imagine how good the last month has been for you both," she wrote.

 

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19 years gone today my Jonny Roe… but still crystal clear in my memory is the warmth, kindness, humour and intelligence of that beautiful soul of yours. To the world you were just someone, but to me you were the world. And how lucky we all are to have known you, Kelsx

A post shared by  Kelly Swanson-Roe (@kelly.swanson.roe) on Jul 26, 2018 at 6:45pm PDT

The couple have embraced Jonny's memory throughout their marriage.

"We talk openly about it, and we have photos of him — we have a little family event each year where we will remember him. [He's] just a very key part of it all," John said to 9Honey. 

"I think [for] anyone having to face this, you've got to have the mindset of embracing the past partner — not trying to exclude or separate yourself from them because that doesn't work. You essentially grow together, you have your own relationship but he is a part of us as well."

Aiken and Swanson-Roe, who is now an Interior Designer, share a son and a daughter together.

As for how she deals with being married to a relationship expert, Aiken told 9Honey that "right from the word go she said, 'I don't want a therapist – cut the psychobabble'," he joked.

"So there was no chance of me being someone other than her husband, which I think is a great thing... you don'’t want to be dating a guru."

Feature image: Instagram/@kelly.swanson.roe.

This article was originally published on March 24, 2019 and has since been updated with new information.