tv

If you’re a genuine fan of Game of Thrones, you should take annual leave on the 20th of May.

My name is Nicolle and it’s been 576 long days since I’ve watched a new episode of Game of Thrones.

I am one of the 136543 million people who have been waiting forever (okay, it’s been two years) for season eight of the HBO show, and no, I’m not coping.

The unspoken reality of what it’s been like waiting for season eight...

To be honest, it’s been a long time since I’ve had to wait for anything. I’ve spent the last ten years in a very happy and fulfilling relationship with technology: Netflix, Stan, Foxtel, Google, UberEats, Airtasker, three hour deliveries from the Iconic (omg ILY) - if I want something, it’s pretty easy to find. I’m part of the generation of instant gratification.

Except when it comes to Game of Thrones.

ALL I WANT TO KNOW IS WHAT THE HELL HAPPENS TO DROGON AND WHETHER JON SNOW AND DAENERYS FIND OUT THEY’RE RELATED AND IF THEY KEEP HAVING SEXY TIME AFTER THAT.

I WANT TO KNOW IF TORMUND AND BRIENNE OF TARTH GET THE CHANCE TO MAKE GIANT BABIES.

Watch the Game of Thrones season eight trailer below. Post continues after.

ADVERTISEMENT

AND I WANT CLARIFICATION ON WHAT THE DEAL IS WITH BRAN - GENERALLY.

Given that the return of this show will likely be the highlight of my year/life, I’m therefore planning to do what any self respecting fan would do:

I’m taking annual leave on the 20th of May.

No, it’s not for the dentist appointment I’ve been too busy to make for the last 12 months.

Or that house inspection I keep getting emails and phone calls about.

It’s because it’s the goddamn season finale of Game of Thrones and I need to give it my full attention.

Yes.

I will be at home. In front of my television. With my cats (and/or partner).

It’s going to be the single most important television event in history. I want to be able to tell my children and grandchildren where I was the moment I learned who finally ends up on that highly sought after Iron Throne.

No - it’s not going to be in an office full of people, with Gary from IT dropping spoilers at inappropriate moments.

ADVERTISEMENT

If you’re a genuine fan of Game of Thrones, I urge you to sort your leave out now.

Because we all know that in 2019, when we’re surrounded by Facebook and Instagram and Twitter and inconsiderate people (I’m looking at you, Gary), it’s impossible to avoid spoilers.

And the experience of watching this finale - the very best finale - will be ruined if you know what to expect.

This epic episode of television is also not something I’m prepared to face spontaneously, or without wine (which I’m pretty sure is frowned upon in the office at 11am).

So on May 20, I’ll be in the privacy of my own home, drinking red wine from pewter mugs, chanting ‘THE KING IN THE NORTH’ while forcing my cat to love me.

I swear it by the old gods and the new.

I’ll be damned if I let something as inconvenient as a pending leave request get in my way.

gif

Game Of Thrones season eight will return to Foxtel Australia on April 15th at 11am.

00:00 / ???