Say hi to Amy.
Amy has just gone back to work after having her second child. She has a man at home, her husband. And he’s taking care of the baby, who’s almost one, and the bigger kid too, when he’s not at daycare.
The man is doing just fine, thanks. He’s enjoying the change from his regular work, having more flexibility in his day. Being outside with the kids, no commute, no deadlines, no boss figuratively tapping their watch.
He’s also doing just fine, thanks, because Amy’s mum is dropping over lasagnas and pasta bakes a few times a week. And because, when Amy gets home from work she still clears the detritus from the day, and sets things up for the next. The little things that keep people alive. You know the drill – wiping surfaces, sterilising night bottles, clearing the dryer filter. Is there milk? Are there clean clothes? Nappies? A change of clothes in the bag? She often mops the kitchen floor because he says “don’t worry about it”, but she does worry about it, actually, because baby spends most of her time down there.
And she also gets on the mothers' group WhatsApp to see what activities the other babies are doing now, and to organise a playdate or two for the big kid to make her husband’s life a bit easier, and that meet-up with another dad because she wouldn’t want her husband to feel isolated. She gets on the app to check that vaccinations are up to date and tries to schedule that ear appointment on an afternoon she might be able to work from home.
Her mum never dropped off a lasagna when Amy was at home with two tiny children, just months before. Even though she was struggling with mastitis, her father was in hospital, and the baby wasn’t sleeping. In fact, Amy's mum's been telling Amy to make sure her husband doesn't feel neglected, since he's "doing so much."
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