After you have kids, you kind of expect that most relationships in your life will change. In fact, most of mine have.
While some of my oldest friendships have strengthened, some withered into mutual parental oblivion, and were replaced with new friendships formed throughout my children’s school years.
As expected, even the relationships with my in-laws have morphed over time, wonderful on occasions, yet sometimes awful and testing.
The relationship that has become most strained however, is the one with my own sister.
Watch: Mamamia confessions - When I met the parents. Post continues below.
I don’t know how many times I’ve been told I’m so lucky to have an older sister.
A sister who was forced to wear matching outfits and piggy tails with me. A sister who was encouraged to hold my hand crossing the road. A sister who babysat me while my parents worked long hours and school holidays. A sister who threatened to beat up anyone who did me wrong.
Even still, I always felt like an annoying little pest. A burden, interfering with her ‘big girl’ plans.
I’d say the majority of us are brought up with the notion that family comes first. Blood is thicker than water.
We make excuses for poor or toxic behaviour toward us. We’re told family members should attempt to get along no matter what and be forgiven of every misdemeanour against us. At least, that is the way I have been brought up.
My sister and I have never had the strongest bond, partly due to age difference but also because we are two very different personalities and with opposing views on many life matters.
So, when I was the first to settle down and have a baby it wasn’t a surprise to anyone in our family or for either of our friendship circles.
Getting married and having children was a part of life I had always strived for, whereas my sister had made it known early on that neither children nor marriage, would complete hers.
That is exactly the way our lives panned out. Me, the family girl, and my sister, the professional single. When I fell pregnant though, it didn’t take long before the excitement of being an aunt set in for her.
And I was happy that I finally felt like I had a sister who was interested in me and my life.