

Trigger warning: This post may be upsetting for readers who have experienced violence.
No girl ever grows up wanting to be abused. It’s not like you dreamed of your Prince Charming hitting you. Nobody ever chooses this.
But the thing is, it’s rarely simple.
You meet a guy. He’s lovely. He has problems yes, but so do you. But somehow your imperfections work to make you perfect for each other. He loves you. You love him.
Maybe, you wrestle. Maybe you tickle, and pin each other down. Maybe, sometimes someone gets hurt. Sometimes he hurts you, sometimes you hurt him. It’s not bad. You are just two very physical people, and sometimes you both take it too far. But it’s okay.
Your mother worries. You reassure her that everything’s okay. You start to see less of your friends, because you are so wrapped up in this amazing person who loves you so much. Some of your friends don’t like him, so maybe you see less of them. Somewhere along the line, life changes, maybe you move away with him, and you start to lose contact with friends, and you see your mum less. Suddenly he is all you have.
You still wrestle. Play. Sometimes it gets a bit scary. You need each other so much. Sometimes he gets so intense, so down. You worry about him, so you give more and more of yourself. He is wonderful. But sometimes you wonder about the life you are missing out on, when all of yours is wrapped up in him. You have trouble making friends, and you come to rely on each other so much, but it’s okay.
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I am living in an abusive relationship with a man who constently puts me down and belittles me, he believes that a woman is to do as they are told we have a three year old little boy together and after being called yet more names and ordered to make food this morning before he went off to wherever it was again i decided enough is enough im leaving. He shouts constently at myself and our little boy when he is here and now our child is swearing at me i have health problems due to depression and anxiety and have just been diagonosed with diabetes im completely alone as i was forced to move here by himself and his family away from everything i had i dont drive and live in an isolated village that doesnt have a shop and im scared
and this happens soo slowly.... slowly enough that you don't even realise that it's happened to you until you come out the other side