I’ve been straightening my curly hair all my life, so much so that when I began wearing it naturally a couple of years ago, my family was sure I’d had a perm.

The funny thing is we all have curly hair, but had spent many years wearing it straight, because it seemed to just be what you do when you have fine but strong hair that can be straightened. This is to the point that we’d never even thought about calling ourselves a curly-haired family.

And yet…this is what we look like, au naturale:

So why did we do this? There’s an inherent, totally subconscious way we think about hair; it shouldn’t ever be frizzy, should look sleek and neat, and straightening it is the best way to achieve that. And I don’t think that’s just something my family thinks; it’s what many of us are led to believe.

Don’t get me wrong, I do love my straight hair when I do it well. https://www.instagram.com/p/B-jQRTcjh2Q/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading

But moving to Sydney changed things. Here, unlike Adelaide, the summer was humid, and being a working gal and sole parent, I’d have no time in the morning to do any styling. So I just bought some curling product and let it dry naturally.

That was only possible because of the miracle product, 3MoreInchesPre Wash Treatment, which I’d sleep in overnight. I found this product myself. Even though I would explain that to every hairdresser, somehow I would still walk out with a cut designed to be straightened, and I was never once sold a curly hair product.

It would take a global pandemic for me to finally realise I needed to see an expert in curly hair. With no professional attention paid to it for three and a half months, my hair was wild and dry and unloved. I thought, there’s got to be a way to need less professional maintenance. So, I decided to educate myself.

I found Rumbie Mutsiwa, who has the salonRumbie and Co, which according to their Insta profile is a “wavy, curly & afro specialist salon, simplfying curly hair.”

I couldn’t get in for two weeks (an excellent sign) and so by mid-June, I was never more excited to see a hair salon in my life.

The experience was a gamechanger. I even wrote a post afterwards, saying “I was today years old when I learned to wash and style my curly hair.”

Firstly, Rumbie (who was born in Zimbabwe, and came to Australia as a student), exuded a quiet confidence that made me feel instantly that she knew exactly what I wanted. She knew why I was there.

Rumbie patiently took me through what I should be doing to my hair, rather than telling me off for my mistakes. And boy, had I been making mistakes!

I’d wash and condition my hair every day, towel dry, then put product in. Lots and lots of it. Then leave to dry naturally, adding more product during the day. Rumbie told me that wasn’t an ideal routine for curly hair; there was a simpler way, and it started with how I washed my hair.

Yes, ideally I shouldn’t be washing it daily, but as I insisted I needed to, Rumbie rolled with that. At the sink, the first thing was to brush my hair with a curly haired brush.

“You have to get the tangle out first,” Rumbie explained. “If you brush or comb it while it’s wet, when your hair is at its weakest, you’re damaging your texture.”

Then she applied about a 20 cent coin size of her brand’s curly shampoo to my wet hair, and rubbed. That’s the best way to describe it. You know how in shampoo commercials, the person lathers their hair into a bubbly mountain? Yeah, you shouldn’t do that if you want bouncy, shiny curls.