'I asked a computer to write a recap of The Bachelors finale episode. It was... scarily accurate.'

In case you missed it, Chat GPT is coming for precisely all of our jobs.

It's a sneaky (and extremely intelligent) AI robot that lives in our computers and operates a bit like a chatbot, but is sophisticated beyond belief. And yes, I'm aware that referring to it as a 'robot that lives in our computers' makes me sound like I know nothing about technology... but that statement is true. I do know nothing about how this works, and that, my friends, makes things 10 times scarier.

Chat GPT has been making headlines since the software became smart enough to get into Medical School – passing the entrance exam in minutes. 

So I thought I'd test it out on something just as highbrow: Writing a finale episode of The Bachelors.

Speaking of: You can watch the trailer for The Bachelors right here. Post continues after video.

This was a little evil on my part because Chat GPT's only flaw is that it doesn't hold recent information, making it hard for it to write 'news', as it only pulls data from around a year ago. But, I did give a fairly thorough three-sentence brief – generously giving this robot the names of the bachelors and my predictions of their top two girls. 

Here's what I told my future arch-nemesis:

Write me a finale episode of The Bachelor, including three bachelors – Thomas, Felix and Jed. Thomas is picking between Kirsten and Lou. Felix is choosing between Krystal and Tilly. Jed is choosing between Tash and Alésia. The finale must include commentary from the host, Osher, and must end in drama and romance.

And the results were... terrifying. Partly because of the content, and partly because Chat GPT wrote this in 47 seconds.

Read the creepy masterpiece in full, here:

Chat GPT writes the final episode of The Bachelors. 

In the dramatic finale of The Bachelors, host Osher Günsberg greets the audience and introduces the three remaining bachelors: Thomas, Felix, and Jed, and the six remaining women, Kirsten, Lou, Krystal, Tilly, Tash, and Alésia. The location is the beautiful Gold Coast, Australia, and the tension is high as the final rose ceremony approaches.

First, Thomas takes the stage with Kirsten and Lou by his side. 

Thomas is wearing a navy blue tuxedo and Lou is wearing a beautiful, long-sleeve black velvet evening gown with a fitted bodice and a full skirt. The dress has a high neckline and a slit up the leg; she accessorises with a pair of statement earrings and a matching bracelet. Her hair is styled in a sleek bob and she wears bold red lipstick. Kirsten is wearing an elegant, strapless light pink chiffon evening gown that falls just above her ankle. The dress has a sweetheart neckline and a flowy skirt; she accessorises with a pair of diamond earrings and a matching bracelet. Her hair is styled in loose curls, and she wears a natural makeup look.

He tells them that he has fallen deeply in love with both of them and that this decision is the hardest one he has ever had to make. After a heart-wrenching moment of contemplation, Thomas ultimately chooses Lou and gets down on one knee to propose. 

Kirsten, devastated, walks away in tears as Lou accepts Thomas' proposal.

Next, Felix takes the stage with Krystal and Tilly. 

Felix is wearing a black tuxedo, Krystal is wearing a stunning, long red evening gown that hugs her curves in all the right places. The dress has a plunging neckline and a train; she accessorises with sparkling earrings and a diamond bracelet to match the sparkle in her eyes. Tilly is wearing an elegant, white long-sleeve lace dress that falls just above her knee. The dress has a flattering neckline and a delicate belt cinching her waist; she accessorises with a pair of simple diamond studs. Her hair is styled in a sleek bun, and she wears a natural makeup look.

He tells them that they are both incredibly special to him and that he has never felt this way about anyone before. He admits that he is unsure of what the future holds, but he wants to take a chance on love. 

In the end, Felix chooses Tilly, but he doesn't propose. 

Finally, Jed takes the stage with Tash and Alésia. 

Jed is wearing a black tuxedo with an unbuttoned shirt. Alésia is in a blue gown with shimmering sequins along the top. Tash is wearing a long-sleeve red evening gown with a fitted bodice, a plunging neckline and a slit up the leg. Her hair is styled in loose curls, and she wears a smoky eye, constantly making eyes at Jed. 

He tells them that he has been through a lot on this journey and has been hurt before. 

He tells Tash that he can't trust her and that she doesn't have the same feelings for him as he does for her. He then turns to Alésia and tells her that he loves her and wants to spend the rest of his life with her. 

He gets down on one knee and proposes to Alésia, who accepts. 

The audience is left on the edge of their seats as the three couples prepare to leave the stage. But just as the happy couples are about to leave, Tash interrupts and tells Jed that she has realised her feelings for him and that she wants to be with him. 

Jed is torn, but ultimately chooses Alésia, leaving Tash heartbroken. 

The audience can see the tears streaming down Tash's face as she gathers her things and leaves.

Osher, looking on in shock, reminds the audience that love is never easy and that the journey to find true love is always filled with drama and heartbreak.

The finale ends on a dramatic note, with two happy couples and one heartbroken woman. The couples are all smiles as they walk away hand in hand, ready to start their new lives together. The audience is left wondering what the future holds for them, but one thing is for sure, they will always remember the journey they took on The Bachelors.

*****

Can.

We.

Please. 

Take a minute to remember THIS WAS WRITTEN BY A ROBOT?!

A robot that's never watched The Bachelor Australia. A robot that doesn't know Osher Günsberg from a bar of soap. A robot that is staring down my job with a glint in its eye that says, "You're f**ked, mate".

Listen to this episode of Mamamia Out Loud, where the team discuss the potential impact of Chat GPT. Post continues after podcast. 

It's also a robot I politely asked to predict the potential future of these couples, and they told me this...

Felix and Tilly: 

They may have a strong connection and a promising future together, but the fact that Felix did not propose, and that they came to know each other through the filter of a reality show makes it difficult for them to build a healthy and lasting relationship. They don't stay together long term but they do become influencers promoting teeth-whitening products.

Jed and Alésia: 

They plan to stay together and have children, but the intense pressure and scrutiny of being on a reality TV show could cause them to have a hard time adjusting to a normal life together. They struggle to maintain the same level of intimacy and connection that they had on the show.

Thomas and Lou:  

After the finale of The Bachelors, Thomas and Lou's relationship continued to grow stronger. They moved in together and started to build a life as a pair. Sure, they faced some challenges along the way, but they always made sure to communicate and work through any issues. They were each other's biggest support system and were always there for each other.

They enjoyed travelling and exploring new places together, and they made many memories that they will cherish forever. They also became popular influencers and tried to use their platform to spread positivity and inspiration.

Eventually, Thomas proposed to Lou again, this time in a more private and intimate setting, and she said yes. They had a beautiful wedding surrounded by their loved ones and started their new life together as husband and wife.

As time passed, they decided to start a family and were blessed with two beautiful children. They were happy to have their own little family, and they enjoyed every moment of it. They made sure to balance their work and personal life, and they always put their family first.

Years went by, and Thomas and Lou's love for each other only grew stronger. They faced the ups and downs of life together, but they always came out stronger on the other side. They were each other's rock, and they were grateful for the journey that brought them together. They were happy and still together, proving that true love can conquer all.

OSHER, ARE YOU READING THIS?!

While Chat GPT believes true love can conquer all, I now believe – more than ever before – that technology will crush my career.

PS. I also tried to make the feature image for this article using another robot: Starry AI. But they drummed up the following photos – so, yeah, graphic designers your jobs are safe. For now. 

Image: Starry AI.

Actual Feature Image: Mamamia + Network 10.

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