weddings

'I love my outfit for a family wedding but will I be hunted by the wedding fashion mafia?'

The wedding fashion mafia are out there, people, and they’re lethal and unforgiving. You’re only an errant flower crown or minor dress-code divergence away from become a target.

Sadly we fear they may have claimed another victim: a user of the parenting forum, Mumsnet, who goes by the code name ‘Rosskidsmum’.

She suspected they may clock her. She even asked for assistance.

“I don’t know if I’ve massively overthought this now, or am I going to be hunted down and killed by the wedding fashion mafia?!” she began her post last week.

“Went shopping for my [fiance’s] cousin’s wedding this weekend. As it’s now going to be too warm for the suit I was originally going to wear, I have purchased cute, checked, tan, tapered trousers and a cream basic t-shirt to go with, paired with tan and cream heels. I was happy with my look…”

Video by Mamamia

Then the poor woman read the ‘rule’ about wearing white – or shades of it – to someone else’s wedding. You know: “Don’t”.

“I would never dream of wearing a cream dress to someone else’s wedding but a t-shirt will be OK, surely?” she asked.

While Rosskidsmum was concerned about the shade, several commenters suggested it was the cut that would put her most at risk.

“I wouldn’t wear t-shirt to a wedding whatever the colour,” wrote one.

We presume they were picturing this:

Which is actually $210. For some reason. Image: Barneys.
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Or this:

But she kindly explained, "It’s not like a cotton t-shirt, it’s like a satin one, long line, helps [hide] the fat rolls."

Still, the mob closed in.

"I personally don't wear anything white or cream to weddings because there are so many other colours to choose from," one wrote. "It's the bride's privilege to wear white on the day; give her that respect."

"I think the whole outfit sounds far too casual for a wedding," added another. "More like a shopping trip to town."

A few brave souls defended her decision, because - you know - free will, and all.

"There is nothing 'inappropriate' about a cream satin, short-sleeved top, matched with different colour trousers," one wrote.

And, "No one will mistake that outfit for the bride's - I wouldn't bat an eyelid to see a wedding guest wearing that."

Rosskidsmum did prepare [read: "panic purchase"] an alternative outfit, just in case: "a black top and blazer". But sadly, we can only presume she stuck with her guns on the cream top, because she hasn't been heard from since.

RIP, Rosskidsmum. RIP.

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