The following contains details of sexual assault which may be distressing. For 24-hour support, please call 1800 RESPECT.
When I picture an ‘alcoholic’, I imagine a man, sleeping rough with a paper bag full of liquor in his hand.
I don’t think of me. I come from a good family, I was educated in private schools and have both undergraduate and postgraduate degrees. I’ve had a hugely successful professional career. I’m well-travelled, financially secure, and happily married with two beautiful children.
But it is me. I am an alcoholic.
I wish I knew where things went wrong, and where I crossed the line from social drinker to full blown alcoholic, but I can’t pin-point the day.
Your body after one year without alcohol. Post continues after video.
But now I’m 47 days sober, and I’ve started to think about what could have affected my self esteem to the point where I abuse alcohol.
How it started
There are only two incidents I can think of. The first one was a sexual abuse, the second one as being called ugly when I was 14.
I can’t remember the exact age I was when I was sexually assaulted, but I remember the details vividly. My family had gone to visit some family friends and my brother and I were playing in the pool with two older boys while our parents were all up in the hotel room.
One of the boys we were playing with was in his mid teens, and he was taking turns of flipping and throwing my brother and I over in the pool, When he grabbed me, he pushed aside my swimsuit bottom and played with my vagina. I tried to swim away from him, but he was too strong. This sexual assault happened multiple times.