WARNING, friends, this question is a little explicit. If your pearls clutch over some frank language and lewd acts… you know what to do.
As told to Ann DeGrey
I went from being celibate and unwanted to a sex-crazed middle-aged mum and it all started when I was running late for school drop off.
My seven-year-old was in tears because he hated being late and it was all my fault. But the last thing I expected was to lock eyes with a good-looking school dad. He was just leaving the classroom and he smiled at me. “Late too? Glad it’s not just me!” And that was that – something passed between us.
I don’t know what it was. It wasn’t love at first sight, but I felt something flash before my eyes. My past? My future? What I know now is my meeting with Tom involved a lot of joy and a lot of heartache.
Tom was tall, blonde with green eyes. Absolutely gorgeous. I saw him the next day at school drop off and he introduced himself. I don’t really know why he started talking to me. Later he told me he was “drawn to me.” He told me he worked nearby, and his wife was unwell. Apparently, she had mental health issues, but I don’t believe that was true.
It was very flattering that the token “hot dad” in the school playground only wanted to make small talk with me. It wasn’t long before Tom invited my son and I for a playdate at a local park. And that was when he made his first move. As the kids were playing, he leaned in close and said “You’re so beautiful.”
My marriage was rocky – my husband was so disinterested in me. He barely touched me, barely spoke to me and I was miserable. So, I was looking for a way out, or at least the thrill of an affair. And that’s what I got – plenty of thrills.
Car sex. Our relationship was all about car sex! I’d lie to my husband and tell him I was meeting a friend for drinks. I’d meet Tom at the car park of the local park and that became our main hook-up place. It was just an ugly car park which is all we deserved I guess, considering how naughty we were being. I walked to Tom’s car, let myself in the back seat and he had me naked very quickly.
Lust is incredibly powerful. You don’t think of anything else. I certainly didn’t care about how risky it was to be having sex in a car just two blocks away from my kid’s school. And anyone entering that car park would have seen us.
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I remember our first time very well. He spent ages sucking my nipples, and then he went down on me, he was literally devouring me. I know it’s a cliché but he was ravishing me as though he was dying of thirst. Then I went down on him – car sex is awkward but it’s also fantastic. Then I straddled him, he was inside me and it was just incredible. When he came, I remember feeling guilty. What kind of woman am I? Imagine my son finding out what kind of mother he has?
I thought, “I’m a terrible person, I’m a monster.”
But that didn’t stop me.
In fact, two nights later we were at the carpark again, madly humping in his car. It was very risky because the carpark wasn’t empty. I told Tom we needed to find a new hook-up place but that didn’t happen for a while. We took stupid risks – one night we were driving to a park out of the area when Tom suddenly pulled over on a busy road. “I have to have you now,” he said. While he was inside me, I remember thinking, “Oh my God, what the hell am I doing having sex in a bike lane?”
The other thing we did in the car (which I still fantasize about) was when Tom positioned me, naked, on my knees facing the back of the car, with my legs spread – he was in the front seat leaning towards me, licking me from behind. As a 40-year-old woman, I’d never had a man so into me sexually, it was really amazing.
We progressed from car sex to bed sex. Tom came to my house while my husband was at work - usually after school drop off. We were having sex every day, sometimes twice a day. This carried on for three months and it wasn’t just about the sex – I realised I was deeply in love with him. But when I told Tom, I loved him and wanted to leave my marriage for him, that’s when things went cold.
He said he loved me but, due to his wife’s mental illness, he could never leave her. I was starting to hate myself. This is not the person I wanted to be. I decided to leave my marriage and stop living a lie. My husband was so disinterested when I asked him for a divorce, it just cemented my decision. But, I was mortified that when I told Tom I was officially single, he stopped coming over after school drop off and eventually stopped replying to my texts. I was absolutely sick with anguish.
Then, weeks later, I was at the shops and there he was – with his wife. She was much prettier than me and they were holding hands. I put my groceries back and fled the shops. I felt so sick; I thought I was going to vomit. I feel like I got what I deserved. I’ll never know if his wife is mentally unwell or he was just using that as some kind of excuse for not leaving her.
Three years later, I’ve moved on with a new partner and my life is good. But I still think about Tom from time to time – is he happy? Did he really love me? One things for sure, he certainly gave me the most exciting sex of my life.
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