By HOLLY WAINRIGHT
Step away from the tinsel. It is NOT Christmas yet.
I know you’re tempted, I know you want to get the party started, but just take a breath.
Hold back. Let it go.
Christmas hasn’t started yet. It’s November. NOVEMBER.
But I can’t blame you for being confused.
In news that makes me want to weep, according to scientists, Christmas now starts on August 19.
The smart people at the Royal Statistical Society have worked out that August 19 is when Chritsmassy words start popping up in Google searches, a date that’s inched earlier and earlier as the Google-able years increase. Back in those innocent days of 2008, Christmas didn’t start until October.
Everyone has a different idea of when Christmas really begins.
According to my local shopping centre, it starts on November 1.That’s when they’ve start dangling shiny wreathes around the escalators, hoping to induce a little retail panic.
According to traditional Catholics, it starts at noon on Christmas Eve, December 24.
According to the Christian tradition of Christmastide it starts on Christmas Day, December 25. And look, they should really know.
Me, I have strict rules about when it’s acceptable to start dangling baubles.And it’s September.
When my colleague told me that her brother’s family already had their decorations up on November 13, I judged.
And when I went round to my friends’s place in February and they still had the tree up – “the kids just love it so much” – I judged.
A bit of reaching out to Reddit on the topic seems to get all the same responses – “I love Christmas, so I put my decorations up in the first week of November.” “We like to put our decorations up in November so we have longer to look at them.” I judged those people, too.
I judged because, in my opinion, these people have Got Christmas Wrong.
I don’t approve of the way Christmas is creeping – the way it get earlier and earlier each year.