When I was a kid my mum sent me to the corner shop to buy her some Modess Super sanitary pads. There was always a pink package on her wardrobe shelf so I knew exactly what I was looking for.
But when I got to the shop I found that all the packets of pads had been wrapped in brown paper, so I had to rely on the shelf labels to figure out which package I wanted.
Why were they wrapped in brown paper? Because the fact that women bleed has always been a taboo topic. And so, I’m sorry to discover, is menopause.
To be clear, because I’m sure you’re wondering, I’m not there yet. In fact last month I bled a little for thirteen days. If you think that’s too much information then imagine if a guy had blood dripping from his penis for thirteen days.
Would he feel unlucky? Inconvenienced? Happy for people to snigger because he’s on the rag? If men menstruated and wore a clumpy pad in their pants would it be seen as false advertising like a padded bra?
I tell you this because I’ve been anticipating the end of the whole bleeding thing for a while since I’m in the 45 to 55 zone where it happens for most women.