Victoria's Secret 2012: First model dressed as a bicycle...

We grappled with whether to bring you this particular fashion gallery, Mamamia readers, we really did.

Victoria’s Secret are like the Voldemort (for non-Harry Potter fans, he’s the super evil bad dude who keeps trying to kill our bespectacled hero) of photoshopping and airbrushing and all things that make us women feel generally rubbish about the way we look.

Even though (hypocrisy alert) some of us in the MM office have bought their lingerie.

So why would we show you a gallery of their 2012 fashion parade?

Well. The first model is dressed as a bicycle.

Read that sentence again because it’s still funny the second time.

But wait, it gets better. The second? She’s dressed as a toddler’s play pen. Or possibly some kind of human piece of Meccano.

Another is dressed as a neurosurgeon who has lost her pants (but not her face mask or gloves). Another is dressed as a Christmas tree ornament.

And this is no referential modern artistic thing. No, no. They’re very literal people over at Victoria’s Secret. The women are dressed to actually look like inanimate objects. But with boobs and sparkly bras on top.

Take a look: