Writing for The Guardian, Vanessa describes her daughter Rosa as “fun, irreverent, stubborn, uncontainable, loving, garrulous, challenging, ingenuous”. She says her daughter had no filter, and always said exactly what she was thinking.
Rosa drowned, when she was just 19, after suffering a seizure while she was swimming.
Six months after her daughter's death, Vanessa found out that Rosa's boyfriend, Adam, had fallen in love with someone else.
While logged into Rosa's Facebook account - something she did to feel closer to her daughter - Vanessa stumbled onto a conversation between Adam and his new girlfriend, Lucie. Vanessa could tell from their conversation that they were in a serious, loving relationship and this just compounded her grief.
"I instantly felt the most unimaginable pain, as if my daughter’s life had meant nothing, as if she had already been replaced," she writes.
In the moment where grief met rage, Vanessa did something she instantly regretted. She quickly typed: "Don’t you think it’s a bit soon to fall in love again?” and hit send. The message showed up in Adam and Lucie's conversation stream as if it had come from his deceased girlfriend.