My radio asked me a question yesterday.
“ARE YOU SINGLE THIS VALENTINE’S DAY?”, my stupidly nosy radio asked me.
“That’s none of your bucking fizzness, radio.” I told my car dashboard.
Radio then went on to encourage me to show some ‘self-love’ by booking myself into a day spa. Later on, a poster at a train station told me to treat myself to chocolates, even though I don’t have a partner. And once I noticed the pattern, I started seeing advertisements and articles everywhere aimed at single people on Valentine’s Day, as not to exclude us poor partnerless plebs.
To all those companies profiting from V-Day, feel free to leave singles out of it. We don’t need to practice self-love.
WE ARE F*CKING MASTERS OF SELF-LOVE.
You don’t need to encourage me to put myself first. I’m single. All I do is self-love (get it? Get it? Sly winky smirk face here).
I give into every whim and desire that my heart pumps out, be it food-related (it almost always is), or spending four hours on the couch watching Grey’s Anatomy in a bath towel while painting my nails and eating peanut butter straight out of the jar (or as I call it, ‘Wednesday’).
If anything, my self-love should be DISCOURAGED. You should remind me to think of someone else for a day. But I won’t listen, because I largely do what I want.
The very existence of a person’s single status is BECAUSE of self-love. They love themselves too much to jump into a relationship they don’t want to be in (before you chuck a wobbly, coupled people, I’m not saying that you have done so).
Forgive me if I speak in generalisations. Not all single people feel the same, obvi. Our lack of partners doesn’t unite us in some sad little club, as is often assumed. As you may have discerned, I love being single – not to say that I don’t keep my eyes peeled for a quality partner (hurry the shit up and propose already, Prince Harry), I do… but I really enjoy
free drinks the dating game.
In contrast, there are plenty of partnerless people who whine about it all day long. But I suspect that they could get an immediate date if they desperately desired one. Jeez, on Tinder, you can get a date with a creep in about 45 seconds*. They just keep letting those pesky self-loving standards get in the way.