A Californian man created a guide for men on how to avoid heartbreak based on a woman’s nails and… what the actual heck, Rocky?
Marwan Alteir, a.k.a Rocky, is the ‘go-to’ for his friends when it comes to dating and relationship advice and he’s so committed he wanted to share his ‘expertise’ with the world.
So, Rocky developed a six-page document called Nails At First Sight which offers uh, very thorough but not-at-all scientific, analysis of manicures to help men navigate the dating world.
“I had so many bros always ask me, ‘Rocky, how do you know the signs? How did you know she was going to break my heart? How did you know she was going to rob me from my dignity? How did you know every single time?'” the apparent love expert says in a video on Twitter.
“After countless hours of research and asking bros around the world, I’ve come up with a full proof survival guide.”
His book breaks down everything to do with a woman’s nails – starting with colour – and it’s… interesting.
Nudes are safe colours, so men can "sleep with two eyes closed". Black, white and french tips are "cautious colours" that can go either way, and anything on the rainbow is... dangerous. Real dangerous, apparently.
"Get health insurance if you're going to be partying or hanging out with this. Get health insurance," he urges.
"Stay away from yellow most importantly. If she has the courage to get yellow nails, she has the courage to chop off your balls."
Then we move on to nail shape, where Rocky advises men stay away from women with sharp nails (which he has called 'mountain peak', 'stiletto' and 'arrowhead', showing off his has real creative flair).