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Our Illustrious Prime Minister, Tony Abbott, has made an important discovery.

 

 

ATTENTION CITIZENS OF AUSTRALIA:

Your Illustrious Prime Minister, Tony Abbott, has made an important discovery. He has figured out, through some skilled deductive reasoning, that women sometimes experience discrimination or bias because of their gender. He has also figured out that this shocking and unfair practice has a name:

SEXISM.

So how did Tony come to make this important discovery?

Well, after his Chief of Staff, Peta Credlin, was criticised by members of his own party for having too much power behind the scenes, Tony got mad. REAL mad. Something about the criticism didn’t feel right to him. Which got Tony to do some thinking:

The PM’s Chief of Staff being powerful hasn’t bothered people before. Could it be that people don’t like it this time BECAUSE PETA CREDLIN IS A WOMAN?

 

 

Mr. Abbott was so damn chuffed with his discovery, that he decided it was imperative to immediately bring it to everybody’s attention. WOMEN ARE GETTING SCREWED OVER AND NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT IT.

So Tony, obviously the type of man to immediately right a wrong when he sees it, went on ABC News and proudly told everybody that sexism is a shocking, disappointing thing. And he knows it, because it’s affecting a woman very close to him.

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When asked about the criticisms being levelled at his Peta Credlin, Tony Abbott gave a pointed, clever (definitely prepared earlier) answer designed to point out this thing he has discovered called SEXISM:

 

 

“Do you really think my chief of staff would be under this kind of criticism if her name was P-E-T-E-R as opposed to P-E-T-A?” he smugly asked.

Well, to be honest Tony, probably not. You are actually onto something there.

Welcome to the world of sexism. We’re so pleased to have you join us.

Now, maybe just add a couple more women to that cabinet of yours (and maybe a couple who believe in feminism if you can manage it). Oh, and also, don’t try to explain economics to women through an ironing analogy. And probably don’t do this next time you hear a woman talk about doing ‘sexy-stuff’:

 

 

But other than that stuff, this whole Tony + discovering sexism thing could be be the start of a beautiful friendship.

WELCOME TONY ABBOTT!