
“Toffee is live”.
… Here we go.
It was just after midnight when my phone buzzed with an alert from Toffee, which meant it was time to trawl through an inevitable sea of private school w*nkers (like me) in the name of love research.
I’d been waiting a couple of weeks for such a notification to come through, ever since the news first broke that Toffee was coming to Australia. So while you were probably fast asleep dreaming, or out making the most of your long weekend, I was wide awake navigating the most obnoxious dating app in the entire world for the purpose of this review.
You’re welcome.
If you haven’t heard of Toffee, it’s much, much more than the sticky, old-school sweet that gets stuck in your back teeth.
It’s the newest dating app for Australian singles that requires its members to have a private education, complete with actual background checks.
WE THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE AT FIRST TOO.
Developed in London, the app is strictly off-limits to anyone who attended a public school thanks to a “hybrid checking process” that uses “automated social media cross checks” and a “manual screening process” to make sure ~the others~ don’t slip through the cracks (yikes).
But look, you might actually be happy to.
Judging by the app’s design, prompts and general marketing – being an old scholar from a private school roughly equates to having a strong interest in the polo, being well-versed in the menus of fine dining restaurants and being the proud owner of a lifelong cricket members pass.
(I must have missed the classes in which these interests were developed).
Watch the promotional video for Toffee below. Post continues after.
I’ve never been to the cricket or the polo, and by no means would be considered “posh”, but as my housemate just kindly pointed out – I’m sitting here writing this review in my old school rowing club jumper. So yeah, I guess I’m “one of them”.
Top Comments
Irony is, people who move in *really* exclusive, wealthy social circles are already well-connected with each other, and so don't need an app to meet. Ultimately all this app will do is allow lower-rung people who never really belonged in the upper echelons to meet, whilst simultaneously pretending they are a part of the A-list (which they are not, and never were).
That's cool, online dating is so good that so many people rushed in. I've find a better dating app called Fwbdr(friends with benefits with no strings attached dating app). Quite good choice for you.