real life

The dating app for people who think they are ridiculously good-looking.

So, yeah, we tried it.

The world of dating is terrifying.

We have to navigate what dating app to use and whether we should also give out our number or is that exposing our privacy or do we add them on Facebook as well as follow them on Instagram, or is Instagram more stalkerish than Facebook? Or if I Google them, is it crossing a line? What if I lie and say I didn’t?

Those are the big issue. What is not a big deal is the fact that you might be better looking than everyone else.

But the creators of the new 8plusapp wants to solve that problem anyway.

Soon to be launched 8plusapp.

8plusapp describes itself as a soon-to-be-launched app that only allows people who are rated 8 or above to be on it.

In the interest of serious journalism, I took it upon myself to sign up to this app and find out more so you don’t have to.

The first thing you notice is that there are no subtle innuendos or hidden meanings. They quite literally say that “tinder is for ugly people” and “the hot people dating revolution is coming” (I think the revolution they mean is 8plusapp but I’m still confused).

In order to find out more about this very important “revolution” they spoke of, I went to their helpful “About me” page. It basically explains that by “hot people” they mean ‘people the app creators think are hot’.

It sounds a liiiittle like it was created by 16-year-old boys. But onwards and upwards to my hot-man future.

Now that I was getting my head around the concept of ‘what is hot’ and ‘revolution’, I bravely entered my details into the pre-registration box.

The result was incredibly disappointing. I was put on a goddamn waitlist. And that waitlist only had 31 other people. Three of which I knew were other women in the office.

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This is some kind of bullshit, 8plusapp.

Not to worry, I noticed that if I referred three friends I could move up in the list and start meeting the 27 handsome people also on the wait-list.

I asked my very helpful friends to use the link to sign up too, then sat back and waited for a sign from God 8 Plus that I was on the train to babe-town.

I waited patiently and refreshed the registration page four times.

Still nothing.

This was disappointing for three obvious reasons:

1) It seems I still have to wait for true love in the form of an 8 or higher.

2) I had convinced more attractive females to sign up thus lowering my own chances of both finding someone and getting on the app myself.

3) How will I ever know if I’m worthy of an 8 Plus title myself? Maybe I’ve already been rejected. Maybe you stay on the waiting list if you’ve been rejected? OH GOD HOW WILL I COPE?

Until they get their shit together and create the app properly, it’s back to the drawing board.

And by drawing board, I of course mean Tinder. With the rest of 8Plus rejects.

If you like this, you’ll like:

Rosie Waterland tried Tinder. It was not pleasant.

What happens when you try the dating app: Happn.

12 stupid mistakes people make on Tinder.

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