Do you remember life before kids?
When the nappy and baby products aisle of the supermarket was the one you skipped straight for the deli counter. When the decorations on your walls were deliberate and you would vacuum the sand out of your car after you went to the beach. You know, to keep it looking nice.
Ah, those were the days.
You actually considered buying a white sofa and just sometimes instead of going to the gym before work you went to the beach and had a swim, a latte and just gazed at the clouds.
The days when blissfully ignorant statements like “ When I have kids I’ll never let them sleep in my bed” would come freely flowing out of your mouth and you’d never even realise just what a blind fool you were.
A thread on the chat site “MumsNet” have been reminiscing on all the dumb things they’ve heard out of the mouths of the non-parents among us, making the staff at The Motherish remember the inane things they once said too…
1. “I’d never lose it at my child in public.”
2. “If you just give him the vegetables he’s going to eat them. He won’t just sit there.”
3. “I’d never let my kid walk around half-naked/in that crazy outfit.”
4. “Soft play looks like great fun. I wish they had it for adults.”
5. “I’d never let my child have a bottle.”
6. “I’m so tired. My dog woke me up at midnight last night to let him outside.”
7. “I will cook my babies organic fruit and vegetable purees. I would never give them anything pre-packaged.”
Long week at work? Never mind, it’s the weekend tomorrow. Image via iStock.
8. "I think I slept too long last night!"
9. "I’m just having a lazy weekend at home pottering."
10. "Let’s have lunch. You can leave the baby with someone can’t you?"
11. "Just ask him to be quiet while you’re on the phone."
12. "I’m ready to leave. I just need my keys and money."
13. "Long week at work? Never mind, it’s the weekend tomorrow."