People who love odd sexual antics and questionable personal hygiene (who doesn’t?) will be very disappointed with the upcoming Fifty Shades of Grey movie.
If you’re one of the millions and millions who have read the Fifty Shades books, you probably maybe might be able to guess which scene Hollywood has edited out of the film.
If you haven’t read it (or would prefer to pretend you haven’t), it involves periods, sex, a bloody tampon and some very descriptive lingo.
Yeah, it’s roughly as uncomfortable as these two actors are standing next to one another.
It’s one of the more iconic scenes in the erotic books, so, ah, it pretty much belongs in the movie. We won’t go as far as to say it’s a travesty, but it kinda is, isn’t it?
In an interview with Variety, 50 Shades director Sam Taylor-Johnson was pretty blunt about the decision, to be honest.
“It didn’t make it into the movie. It was never even discussed,” she said.
Apparently, this version of Fifty Shades is not the hard-core pornographic “love story” it was supposed to be.
There’s going to be less sex, less nudity, and no full-frontal penis shots from Christian Grey.
Which, let’s be honest, cuts out about 75% of the book.
This makes us very mad, because no one reads Fifty Shades for the quality of the love story. We have Twilight for that. We read it to get our rocks off, in a literary sense.
Hollywood, stop trying to make Fifty Shades: The Love Story happen.