Like people in animal costumes before her, the Sunrise Cash Cow’s identity has been the subject of much conjecture*.
This morning, viewers had that mystery solved for them when the Cash Cow’s head fell right off on live TV.
I imagine that if you were not viewing Sunrise this morning, you are curious to know the answer to this eternal question.
Allow me to relieve you from your tenterhooks: the Cash Cow is no cow at all, but a bull — or at least a steer.
The person inside the costume was a man, man.
Watch the moment the Cash Cow’s head FELL OFF! Post continues after video.
The accidental decapitation occurred during a segment in which the Cash Cow found a girlfriend.
I guess if the CC was meant to be a girl, that would have made her a lesbian. That’s quite progressive for Sunrise.
Anyway, the CC was a man, specifically, a man with short hair and stubble.
“Stop it, you’re a girl, oh my God!” Armytage shrieked.
“Cut away,” Kochie ordered. But the jig was up.
The Cash Cow has given away millions of dollars since 2011, so viewers probably didn’t have a cow following the revelation. Get it? HA!
*This is possibly an overstatement.
UPDATE: A Mamamia staffer has informed me that a female acquaintance has previously played the role of Cash Cow. So the mystery of the cash cow’s true identity remains.
