There are plenty of things that p**s me off: sexism, racism, ageism… basically any ism. But there is one recurring issue that, despite its stupidity and absence of logic, makes my blood boil: single shaming.
I was reading an article over lunch the other day about Yumi Stynes commenting on Sophie Monk as the choice as the new Bachelorette.
She said: “You have to believe that they could be single for some reason. If they were so unreal, you’d go, ‘Why isn’t she with someone?’
“You have to be able to see that she’s a little too crazy, and that’s why she’s the Bachelorette.”
Now, after a sojourn to coupledom, I am a proud single woman again (hear me roar!) and reading this comment made me lose my appetite. Jokes, I finished my quarter pounder meal and had a Snickers.
But this single shaming has got to stop! Firstly, there’s something wrong with all of us because, you know, no one is perfect. Secondly, that idea implies that people in relationships have nothing wrong with them, and we all know that isn’t true. Especially that person…you know that person, who managed to score that amazing partner and for all that is good and pure, you can’t figure out how they pulled it off. And thirdly, there are plenty of reasons one might find themselves single that are completely separate from our personality flaws.
The belief that your singleness means you are broken in some way goes hand in hand with the belief that every single woman is dying to be paired off.