couples

Four signs that your marriage could end in divorce.

 

Crumbs and lettuce leaves everywhere, and your partner has left the chopping board out. If this leaves you questioning why you chose to marry such a grub, your future together could look very bleak.

John Gottman, a psychologist at the University of Washington and Robert Leveson, a Berkeley psychologist at the University of California, have revealed four behaviours that suggest you and your significant other may not be so compatible in the long run.

There's signs for divorce. Image via iStock.
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In a 14-year study of 79 couples living across the US Midwest, they analysed 15 minutes of their subjects' conversations. If any four signs occurred within that time frame, the psychologists could predict which marriages would last and which were doomed.

After including questions relating to the satisfaction of relationships and whether participants pondered on separation, they found 93% of the couples they predicted would end in divorce did.

The alarming stats resulted in naming their study 'The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse'.

So, what are the four terrifying signs that you and your partner could be in the midst of a relationship apocalypse?

Contempt.

This is beyond feeling frustrated with your partner - rather you truly believe they're beneath you.

It's always important to remember that there are two people in a relationship. Two people who should equally contribute and support one another.When the scales tip too far to one side however, one person becomes selfish and refuses to look at things from a perspective other than their own.

People become selfish. Image via iStock.
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If you find yourself questioning your partner's stupidity when they make a simple mistake instead of putting yourself in their shoes, you might have a problem.

Stonewalling.

No one truly enjoys confrontation but often it's the most effective way to address an issue. If you walk away, start scrolling on your phone or commence some pointless activity to avoid the daunting task, you may have lost the opportunity to fix a vital part in your relationship.

Sure, arguments and disagreements aren't always fun but choosing to keep things bottled up inside could be doing more damage than good.

Talk to one another, overcome the awkwardness and address the issue. Because it's bound to come up sooner or later.

WATCH people share the moment they knew it was time to get a divorce. (Post continues after video.)

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Defensiveness.

This is when you jump at the chance to blame your partner. It's never your fault, it's all their doing, you're just an innocent bystander.

Just like if you both forgot to bring the birthday present but immediately place the blame on your partner who should have been responsible for it in the first place. Because they bought the damn thing.

Not only does this make them feel like a terrible person but only worsens the situation.

Criticism.

Criticism is hard in any situation. But when it's your life partner doing it to you, you're expected to feel pretty average.

If you turn what your partner did into a negative comment on their character trait then it's only going to build up between the both of you.

Negativity can build up between you. Image via iStock.
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Choose the softer approach and see how your partner reacts when you let them know that a certain thing does bother you and you would love for them to try and avoid doing it in the future.

Do keep in mind that it is completely natural to experience some of these emotions at one point or another in your relationship. But if you find these taking over the affections you have for your partner, it might be time to reassess.

What signs would add to the list?