Heidi Hamm, a mother of three, woke up one day and realised she was spending… oh… let’s say 98.6 per cent of her time tidying up after people.
Which is fine.
Except that it is absolutely not fine at all.
Hamm, a contributor to a blog titled Her View From Home, posted on Facebook, “For years I would spend a few minutes every night, cleaning up after my kids. I would hate to calculate just how many hours of my life have been spent picking up toys. A heck of a lot.
“I love a clean house,” Hamm concedes. And the thing about kids, is that they literally follow you around the house undoing all your work for at least the first 18 years of their lives.
“One night my husband found me on my hands and knees, colour coordinating the Lego. Did I mention I like things organised?” she writes.
“I was exhausted. Which is a common state for me.
“‘Why don’t you just shut the door?’ He asked.”
And, after she resisted the urge to yell/throw lego at him/divorce him on the spot, Hamm realised that those seven words were exactly what she needed.
Rather than cleaning her entire house, top to bottom, room by room, she just… closed the door.
“These days everybody is talking about how self care is so important when you’re a parent. And it is. It’s so easy to lose yourself in taking care of everyone else. But self care? Yeah, it’s not so easy. It takes time, and energy and asking for help,” Hamm continues.
“But sometimes? Self care is hiding a stash of chocolate bars and keeping them all for yourself.
“Self care is turning on Netflix for the kids so you can drink your coffee. Hot…
“Self care is closing a door.”
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Top Comments
My kids know that if I have to ask them more than twice to clean up after themselves, their toy/clothes/miscellaneous item they've left lying around gets binned/donated to charity. Any binned/given away items are not replaced, so there will be no new helicopter Lego (or the like) to replace the one that has been donated/thrown out. After the first couple of times they learned pretty quickly to clean up after themselves without being asked.
Or, maybe insist that your husband helps around the house that teach your kids how to clean up after themselves to a mutually acceptable level?
The vast majority of women I know that fret about the state of their house, or complain about all the time they spend cleaning, have a husband that does nothing and kids that aren't expected to do chores.