They say when you have a baby it changes your life. True, it did. The good, the bad, the ugly and it was all beautiful (so far, in hindsight). And I’d like to think I have a pretty chilled baby (touch wood) so even though we don’t have close family in Australia, we got through fairly unscathed.
So now that my son Hugo is coming up to a year and a half, naturally we’re thinking about having number two. We want a good gap between the two, my partner and his brother are four years apart and he feels it’s a really good gap. Whereas my sister and I are nine years apart, we were never in the same life stage and made it hard to relate to one another or even to hang out together so we grew up as two separate ‘only-child’ basically.
I’ve always wanted three children because my partner and I both come from a family of two, but when I asked parents in my circle who have more than one child – their answers left me with very mixed feelings about when and how many more kids to have. Here are the pros and cons from my impromptu interviews:
THE BAD(ISH) STUFF:
Time: You don’t get the luxury to comfortably sit for an hour or more breastfeeding your little one because you have the older on to deal with too.
Splitting your time so your older kid does not feel flicked to the side, also because you’re still their mother too.
Saengtip and her son, Hugo, after a few months.
Apparently, the biggest impact with your first is the lifestyle, with your second is time-management. (Then she left it at that - what does it mean?!)
Routine: Sleep - the kids (and you) will not sleep at the same time. Joy.
Logistics: Getting out of the house - someone's missing a shoe, someone's done a poop in their nappy, someone's crying, someone's spilt something all over themselves.
Getting in and out of the car. And breathe.
Listen: We talk about the number of kids that are the most stressful. (Post continues after audio...)