Another thing to add to the list of wedding etiquette anxieties.
Weddings are all about manoeuvring the minefield of social etiquette. We know this. Asking to bring a partner, if there’s no plus one mentioned? Not OK. Wearing white if you’re not in the bridal party? Really, really not OK. Turning up a bit pissed, without shoes, with your one night stand from the night before? That’s hilarious, but also definitely not OK.
More and more brides are looking to online forums to ask for advice on how to manage their wedding-day woes. But it was popular bridal bible A Practical Wedding that had a tricky moment this week when a bride wrote in for some, er – controversial advice.
“One of our guests did not give us a wedding card or gift. It wouldn’t bother me so much except that she is my best friend from growing up, a bridesmaid in our small wedding party, and she brought her boyfriend to our wedding. Maybe she thought that she didn’t have to give us a wedding gift because she was a bridesmaid?”
Ordinarily, anyone complaining that they didn’t receive a gift would be stared down with a ‘how old are you?’ glare, but a wedding gift? Well, many would say that it’s a different kettle of fish.
The response from Liz Moorhead, resident agony aunt at A Practical Wedding, had no time for the wedding belle whinging. She quickly shut down the narky bride by pointing out the emotional/financial/time costs that a member of a bridal party commits to a wedding is gift enough.
She also noted that speculating on the bridesmaid’s personal cash situation (oh, I didn’t mention that, did I? Yuh. Bridezilla felt that since her bridesmaid could afford a European holiday, she could afford a gift) was both rude and ignorant of her friend’s financial reality. Preach, Lizzie!