To shave or not to shave is a question I repeatedly asked myself for months and tried my very hardest to avoid for over 15 years.
I like researching, being prepared and knowing what I’m in for so when it came time to consider if I should shave or not, I read articles, watched YouTube videos and read so many blogs.
Watch: Crazy Hair Day with alopecia. Post continues below.
I had a whole Pinterest board filled with images of beautiful bald females just to give me a little reassurance that I would still look pretty, feminine and me if I was bald.
The words empowering, liberating, control, freeing and relief were repeatedly used on social media to describe shaving one’s hair. But honestly, I didn’t feel any of those emotions for months after I did the shave.
Maybe some of those people felt that way because it was a choice, or maybe they wrote their accounts after they had come to terms with it, or maybe their journey was different.
But for me, this wasn’t a choice.
Shaving my hair was losing a lifetime battle.
It felt like I was giving up and giving into the disease.
It was a normal day when I finally decided to shave my hair. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, I just got tired of all the panic attacks, feeling self-conscious, anxious and sad all the time.
70 per cent of my hair was gone by this point and I hated that I constantly worried what I looked like and let my hair (or lack of) affect how I lived and what I did with my life.
My housemates did the shave. I wasn’t strong enough to do it myself.
When it did happen, I was in shock. I stared blankly ahead with tears silently dripping down my face and I wrapped myself in a little ball on a chair while one of my housemates cut off my ponytail and the other shaved the little hair I had left.
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8 May 2020 “What if I told you that what the world needs right now is you – flawed, fumbling, wounded, trying-to-figure-it-all-out you? Because that’s exactly what it needs, you know – more velveteen-real people who are a little worn and a little weary, but who bring a whole lot of warm and welcoming and wonderful to life.” ― L.R. Knost This! This just makes me smile ???? Please know you are enough. You are beautiful. Know that being beautiful is not just about looks but also about who you are as a person and how you make other people feel. That the world is a better place because you are in it. That you are loved. That your smile, your hug or a kind word from you can turn someone’s bad day into a good day. That sometimes our imperfections or the things we have gone through shape us to be the wonderful and warm person we are today. #thebaldgirldiaries #baldgirl #bald #alopeciaawareness #alopeciasupport #alopeciauniversalis #alopecia #autoimmunedisease #hairlossjourney #hairloss #dontjudgeabookbyitscover #rockthebaldlook #thisisme #bareitall #shave #beautiful #wonderful #smile #enough #beauty #imperfections