real life

The celebrity who's saving us from daggy mum undies.

A celebrity designer has come to rescue us from daggy mum undies. But do we want saving?

Did you ever wish your maternity undies were, you know, sexier?

What a silly idea, right? Sexy is the last thing you’re thinking about when you’re adjusting to life with a newborn. Plus, let’s just put it out there that after you’ve had a baby, your undies get a bit of a, um, workout. And you wouldn’t want to subject your best pants to that.

Well, you’re wrong. Because here comes the gorgeous Dita Von Teese, with a new range of maternity underwear that is downright hot.

Here’s one of the bras:

All the bras are front-opening or have removable cups for breastfeeding. But good luck with shoving a breast-pad down the front of this baby. And all the knickers have an elasticated panel to hold in your tummy. It had better be industrial strength.

Dita says, "Elegant underpinnings are a simple way to create everyday moments of luxury and beauty, and why wouldn’t a new mother enjoy beautiful lingerie, too?"

Well, Dita, I've got a couple of reasons: Leaky boobs, for a start. The fact that over the first year of your baby's life your breasts will change size about 15 times. And knickers? Jesus. Let's just say, not in the first six weeks.

Also, if you're sleep-deprived and emotional, you might not want to be encouraging any, um, exciting ideas in your loved one.

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Let's also say that if you're a breastfeeding mum then the first few weeks after giving birth, the words "sexy" and "boobs" do not belong in the same sentence. Your relationship with your breasts is undergoing a shift. During your pregnancy they shifted from decorative to useful, and the transition doesn't really reverse for a long, long time.

But Dita, there is one good reason why sexy feeding bras are a good idea. 

When you're nursing a baby, you'll be flashing that bra to more people than you ever thought possible. Sometimes, as I unhooked my sensible, MASSIVE mat bra, the cheapest style that I could find (because who wants to spend money on a sexy maternity bra, right? WRONG.) I would get a little touch of envy when I glimpsed the much more attractive undies of my fellow mums.

"I must get me one of those," I'd think. I'd then completely forget, because BABY.

Zzzzzzz...

Do you, or did you, want sexy maternity undies? 

CLICK THROUGH to see Dita's range of "sexy" maternity undies.

Like this? Try:

Sex in the delivery room? Apparently so. 

I hated breastfeeding, and that's okay.