Chill out: The ideal amount of sex you should be having is less than you think.

You know what? I reckon women’s magazines have more of a say about my sex life that I do.

Once a day, once a year, upside down, back to front, on the kitchen bench or whilst listening to Tibetan singing bowls: the possibilities of HOW and WHEN you should be getting jiggy with it are endless.

And all of this, usually, in the name of good health.

But a study has emerged proving that everyone just needs to chill the heck out, because the health benefits associated with sex are satisfied in one bonk a week.

via GIPHY

The article, with the VERY SOOTHING title of “Sexual Frequency Predicts Greater Well-Being, But More is Not Always Better”, was published in Social Psychological and Personality Science. 

(Which means that it definitely trumps that sealed section you’ve taken for gospel since you were 15.)

Right, so, here’s the bottom line: yes, frequent sex is good for you. Great for you, actually. But the health benefits of a steamy shag peter out when you exceed once a week.

So like, congratulations to all those couples who get groovy before their Weet-Bix every single bloody morning, but it ain’t any better than Mr and Mrs Long Term Relationship who pencil in their Sunday morning session.

Hands up who feels better about themselves!

“In a study where people provided reports of their daily activities and associated affect, sex was the activity rated as producing the most positive effect,” says the article.

“…However, for couples with busy lives, work responsibilities, and children to care for, feeling the pressure to engage in sex as frequently as possible may be daunting and even stressful.”

Um, duh.

But for the times that we are not exhausted or just really bloated from two-for-one taco Tuesday, why does sex feel so damn good? What actually are these mysterious health benefits to a good shag?

The report lists the two greatest benefits of sex as emotional responses.

“As we predicted and consistent with the results from our first study, sexual frequency had a positive linear association with satisfaction with life… Sexual frequency also had a positive linear association with relationship satisfaction.”

(And here we were thinking it was just great bed hair.)

From a physical standpoint, sexual intercourse lowers your blood pressure, stimulates your nervous system, burns fat, and can even help alleviate pain. Less aspirin, more orgasm etc.

But the stress of trying to squeeze in sex every other day can generate some serious bad vibes when you're in a relationship. Feelings of guilt, pressure, or shame in not being able to find the time or energy for sex will eventually drive you from wanting to do it altogether.

"The current set of studies help dispel the notion that sex has limitless benefits for well-being," concludes the article, "and instead, indicate that at least for people in romantic relationships, sexual frequency is no longer significantly associated with well-being at a frequency greater than once a week."

PREACH!

See you on Sunday, folks.