A nurse, school teacher, hooker, Hermione Granger, the President’s daughter?
Role playing. It might seem challenging (I, for one, would have no idea how not to laugh), but apparently it’s good for your mental health and (hopefully) your sex life.
How can it help me mentally? I hear you ask… According to Scott Haltzman, author and assistant professor of psychiatry at Brown University in Rhode Island, it’s all about forgetting the stress of everyday life.
“Part of enjoying tantalising sex is experiencing a level of escape,” Haltzman told Men’s Health. “Role playing interweaves well with the natural tendency to dissociate from the daily demands of life.”
Just like meditation.
As for helping your sex life, it’s all about pushing your pleasure boundaries using the safety (and comic relief) of a character mask (Darth Vader anyone? But, actually – it’s a thing).
Women in the Mamamia office confess to the weirdest thing they’ve ever heard between the sheets. Post continues below.
“Role playing is a comfortable way for couples to explore their sexuality from behind masks. Often the roles people enjoy most are the ones that are the most different from their normal lives,” a sex researcher at the University of Illinois at Chicago Brian Mustansk also told Men’s Health.
Star Wars aside, it’s easy to see how role playing might open up an entirely new level of freedom within a sexual partnership. It can be a platform to test out some previously-hidden, more kinkier desires.
“One of the biggest fallacies about sex and relationships is that they have to be fuzzy and comfortable. Sometimes it’s important for them to be just slightly uncomfortable,” Haltzman said. “Most people’s fantasies aren’t really safe.”
When are these not-so-safe, supposedly-orgasm-inducing fantasies best played out? Ideally, with a long term partner (i.e. someone you can trust) and, in some cases, in order to return the spark to a long-term relationship.
“Dopamine levels [in the brain] diminish as you’re exposed to something repeatedly, and exposure to anything novel stimulates feelings of excitement and attraction,” Haltzman said.
Communication, honesty, trust and a sense of humour are key to making role play work. You can use props, costumes, characters, acting and different voices to bring the concept to life (or to climax). This will, likely (if you’re acting is anything like mine), take a few times to perfect.
For this reason, and to garner a more personal, experienced insight into the world of role playing, I turned to the number-one source of juicy sex advice: the secret-sharing website Whisper.sh and the gold-mine of a crowd-sourcing reddit.com.
A Morman bride has designed an app that has Carla GS hot under the collar (post continues after audio)…
Here’s what I discovered (it needs to be shared, I can’t un-see these comments and therefore you must experience them too).
My boyfriend and I did schoolgirl and teacher sex last night and it was the most amazing sex I’ve ever had, even though I was so shy.
I like to do stepmom/stepson ( incest or not, it’s up to the other person) or teacher/student where I am the student. Neighbours is also something I really like.
My partners can be any monster they want, they just need to tell me the name so I can read up on it.
I love role playing during sex, I am the woman that sometimes likes to be the man.
My husband and I regularly role play in bed. I like to be the babysitter, that steals him from his wife.
I am female, bi, 23 and a wolf hybrid. You found me in an upscale store. I have never been owned before as the wolf in me makes it hard to train. The human part of us [wolves] allows us to be used sexually, as we are considered capable of consenting.
“Your husband’s friends are coming over for poker night, and you know what that really means. What are you, the good little hostess, going to be wearing for him and his friends?”
My boyfriend and I role play that we are strangers and have just met when we go to bars and clubs. It keeps our relationship interesting and fresh.
Sometimes I like my husband to pretend I’m someone else during sex and that he’s cheating on me.
Then there is this, absolute gem:
The best sex I’ve ever had was when my boyfriend wore a batman mask and pulled my Wonder Woman costume to the side. Do not underestimate the power of role play.
Wonder Woman, I will never underestimate the power of role play again. And this, I couldn’t resist: