The road to beauty is undoubtedly a bumpy one, as anyone who’s ever shaved their legs knows all too well.
One minute you’re feeling smug about your silky smooth limbs and the next they’re covered in tell-tale red spots.
But what exactly are the “shaving bumps” or “shaving pimples” that last long after your razor’s been safely stowed in the bathroom cupboard.
Look, you really don’t want to know.
No seriously, there’s still time to turn back.
Okay, FINE. We’ll tell you, but don’t pretend like you weren’t warned.
The reason is this little guy:
Just when you thought the worst crime of your disposable hair removal device was it's bizarre lack of gender neutrality, we've got news:
It's also a festering germ magnet.
Leaving your razor in and around the shower exposes the blades to bacteria, which thrives in the moist (don't act like that word didn't just gross you out) environment.
When you shave, it then nests in the open pores in your legs and arm pits, causing the bumps to form.
Of course, any reason to abandon shaving altogether is obviously not that unwelcome — it's 2017, after all — but in case you do want to keep up the practice there are a few ways to minimise the yuck factor.
Firstly, you can replace your razor often.
And secondly, you can give it a good ol' cleanse with soap before putting it to work.
Monique Bowley deep dives into the enigmatic world of pubic hair, piercings and alcohol with Jessie Stephens and Luca Lavigne. Post continues after audio...
Using a warm wet towel is also a simple way to soothe the skin, post-shave, and letting it breathe by wearing loose-fitting clothing is also an A+ tip for smooth sailing.
In case you were wondering, waxing is also a more hygienic method of hair removal. Or, y'know, you could just let it grow, baby grow.
The award-winning podcast Mamamia Out Loud is doing their first live show. There will be laughs, disagreements and you can meet the hosts afterwards! We’re also donating $5 of every ticket price to Share The Dignity so grab your friends and come along to share the love and laughs, get your tickets here.