11 reasons people divorce after less than a year of marriage.

From people who’ve been there.

When it comes to short-lived marriages, we know it’s pretty common amongst celebrities. But it’s harder to comprehend when it happens to family, or friends, or even yourself.

And it’s hard to stop the questions whirling around in your head. Questions like:

“What happened?”

“Didn’t they have some doubts?”

“What was the problem in the relationship?”

And the clincher:

“Why did they get married in the first place? ”

While they’re all difficult to answer, some Reddit users have tried. And we believe them because they’re all from people who have already been there.

1. They became a different person.

“I went through with the wedding because I loved her, obviously, and I thought she loved me. I mean, she ‘proposed’ to me, albeit in a messed up way: She guilt tripped me into proposing. (Yep, I’m an idiot.) What happened after we married? She became a different person. She was never home when I was and always with friends. She stopped paying rent and other bills. I had to pick up the slack. She got ‘mugged’ so I gave her my credit card so she could get necessities like petrol and then she goes and spends thousands on irrelevant junk. When she left me, she keyed my car and told me she had met a guy at a bar a while back. We were together for over eight years before we married and all that happened just a few months in. I shouldn’t feel loss after she left me, but it still hurts a year later.”

"What happened after we married? She became a different person."

2. They wanted to have children too quickly.

"I married him because I felt so happy to be part of a big loving family since my own is deeply dysfunctional and abusive, and I've mostly cut them off. He had been saving for years to buy a home before we met and was happy that an extra income would get him to that goal sooner. We agreed to start trying for a baby about six months after the wedding -- never mind that he didn't have sex with me anyway or care about fulfilling my needs in that department in other ways. This situation didn't change, and he would sometimes harangue me about why I wasn't pregnant yet... I finally left when he yelled and swore at me, calling me names in the middle of a crowded restaurant at a friend's toddler's birthday party. The best I can figure out, he got cold feet on the home-buying and baby-having front after the wedding and just never had the guts to actually enunciate that. He just passive-aggressively undermined everything and became increasingly bitter and nasty."

3. They cheated.

"I'll spare you the sob story: We were together for four years. I had reservations but due in part to some past issues with my family, I went ahead and married him. He was all I really had and I relied on him too much. When I wanted to wait (he was seven years my senior) to marry, he told me how much he loved me, and how it would work because we belonged together. I believed him because I loved him. Six months in, he cheated. It was the first time in our entire relationship. We tried to work on it afterward but he forgot our first year anniversary because he was out with her yet again. I asked for a divorce and was finalised this past December."

"I believed him because I loved him. Six months in, he cheated."

4. They developed an addiction.

"One month after my ex-husband and I were married he went out drinking with some friends. He tried some cocaine... and that was it. He became a severe alcoholic and drug addict. He is still a junkie to this day. We were only married 8 months from I do to divorce day in court. It still breaks my heart."

5. They tried to change me.

"She stopped loving me for who I am. She kept trying to make me into something I'm not. She would always be questioning me, belittling me, and emasculating me. I got so used to acting the part she wanted me to be I almost forgot who I really was. She always made me feel 'needed' but never 'wanted'. At one point she told me she thinks she might have missed out on parts of life because we got married so young. Then, that she wasn't sure she loved me anymore. All of this and I am the bad guy because I asked for the divorce."

6. They thought I was their property.

"My ex-husband thought that our marriage certificate gave him license to treat me like property and do whatever he wanted. He blatantly disregarded my feelings because I was 'stuck' with him. Wrong. It was definitely a shitty situation, but I learned a lot. Like, if a guy stalks you and sabotages your PC in order to get a date, he's probably not fit for dating. (I was 18 at the time, what can I say...)"

"My ex-husband thought that our marriage certificate gave him license to treat me like property."

7. They lost their job.

"I was married for almost eight months. We were together for three years or so beforehand. I was going through a lot of problems in my own little world (my close friend/boss of four years dying, my parents splitting up) and we were paying for everything ourselves. I told myself things were wacky because we were both under lots of stress. She lost her job two months after the wedding and refused to look for other work (before, she was making almost twice as much as me per hour). So there I was, trying to support us by myself. She always drank a lot, but she started drinking even more. She got mean and nasty and everything just spiraled out of control. She just moved out in April."


8. They had debt.

"I met my ex through Facebook. We were both young (23 at the time) and lived in different countries. We wanted to carry on our relationship for more than a few weeks at a time. It was expensive to keep flying halfway across the world, so we decided to take the plunge and marry. It wasn't until after we were married that I found out he was thousands of dollars in debt. Not only that, he was spending a lot of time driving around in my car to pick up high school girls while I was working. Of course, as the oblivious and dedicated wife, I didn't believe when people were telling me he was cheating; even when it came from the women who were sleeping with him. Needless to say, we got a divorce. Pro tip: Don't marry someone just because they're from a different country. The novelty wears off after a while."

9. We were separated for a long time.

"I got sent overseas for an unexpected three year tour, so it was an 'all or none' kind of situation. She had a lot of friends in the military so I thought she would have realised how hard deployments can be and would be better able to handle them. Turns out she was not one of those people who handles the military stuff well. Even then I would have sucked it up and dealt with it at least until I went through shore duty, but she moved back home with over a year left of me being overseas and that was pretty much the beginning of the end."

"I got sent overseas for an unexpected three year tour.."

10. We weren’t compatible.

"Our problem was an underlying incompatibility that I wasn't fully aware of until later. I'm not overly affectionate and she very much needed that. Every time our relationship would get to a point where she was ready to make a split, we'd cross another milestone (saying 'I love you,' moving in, getting engaged, getting married) and she'd be back on cloud nine without a worry in the world. I didn't know about this roller coaster she was on until it was far too late. By the time we separated and sought counselling she was already checked out. She unintentionally gave me a dose of my own medicine by not being responsive to communication or intimacy."

11. We were young and dumb.

"We didn't know what we wanted. Well, she did -- and it was someone else. Unfortunately, in the time we were together, she found ways to sever my ties with a lot of really good friends and ruin chances of making up with them."

Did your marriage end after less than a year?

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