We lost you today.
On my way to the scan I allowed myself to be a little excited to see our precious baby’s heartbeat. I hadn’t let myself feel a lot of excitement in the past because so far finding out we were pregnant was just too much happiness to feel all at once. I absolutely believed you would be a reality for us, but to feel that in my heart was just too much of a risk to take after so many setbacks.
Over the last few days though, happy was beginning to infiltrate. So much so Dad and I told your Grandma’s, Pop, Aunt’s and Uncle’s that you were on your way to us. To see your family burst with love spelled the end of my heart.
Telling them meant it was real. It meant you were now in my heart, body and soul… and theirs. Everything I did was for you. I hope you heard me tell you every day that ‘you are healthy, you are loved and you are wanted’. You still are.