Agree agree agree. What is also frustrating about this group of people is that if they do start a successful company/brand/business they claim to be "self made", without any of the acknowledgment of the various ways in which they have been advantaged through money, connections, experiences, opportunities, being able to fail etc. I have attempted these discussions a few times, and it falls on deaf ears. The most privileged seem to push back against the idea that they are privileged at all, while I've found that those in more modest circumstances very easily own any privilege they have because they actually see the other side and understand how they have it better.
Thank you Megan for sharing your story - you are an incredibly strong person to have gone through what you have, and still have the energy to help others. I wish you and your beautiful family all the health and happiness in the world <3
Oh I feel this deep. I'm in my 40s and my mum STILL does this to me. I have had all the conversations, explained the impact, expalined that I'm healthy, that is makes me feel bad and like my body is wrong, that it's not helpful, told her repeatedly to just stop etc etc. We've had many many fights over this. And she still does it regularly. Becuase her issue with my body is that I am "underweight" she believes it's ok - she is just worried and is helping me apparently. It has given me severe self esteem issues since childhood.
Sadly I think there about a million women in Australia that will relate to this situation.
Totally disagree. When I was single and lived alone, I regularly had "girl dinners", though I never realised what I was doing had a name. I just ate whatever I wanted whenever I wanted it. It wasn't about deprivation, or restricive eating, or exhaustion, or work culture. It was "what do I feel like tonight?" And sometimes it was a more traditional full meal, sometimes it was a cheese plate, and sometimes it was a bag of chips and a banana. Who cares? Also, my "girl dinners" were always more junky and fatty than my regular dinners, so that debunks half this article. Just let women eat what they want without all the analysis - sigh.
I remember being tired before I had kids, and the response from mums being "you don't know what tired is." And it was annoying, as I was tired, and they didn't own tired. Then I had a baby, and I realised they were right.
I've been the Tracy in this situation. Reading this post, it is clear the the writer doesn't get it - the post comes off as so self-absorbed even as the writer is trying to say how hurt she was by this and what a good friend she was. All I read was "I was in disbelief, I was shocked, I was sick to my stomach, I had been a good friend, I was helpful in a crisis , I'm heartbroken' etc. A lot of "I this" and "I that". No where did I read any genuine reflection of her behaviour and how it impacted on Tracy, nor any actual concern for Tracy's mental health. Just her own hurt feelings, and justifications for how she is in the right and Tracy's version of events and her feelings about it are wrong. Isn't this called gaslighting? Even going to other friends to invalidate in her own mind what Tracy had written. Painful to read.
Thank you for this perspective. My son just turned 2 and I get this question a lot. I likewise had complications during pregnancy, a premature birth by c-section, and developed an incurable auto-immune disease as a result of pregnancy. I have yet to have my cycle return so am currently infertile - who knows if I will ever ovulate again. But to look at me, you wouldn't know any of this.
Thanks for this perspective. I'm tall and skinny and have been getting negative comments and judgment about it my whole life. I've literally had strangers in the street tell me I'm going to die if I don't eat something. The constant commentary on my body caused me a lot of anxiety and mental health issues in my teens and 20's, but if I tried to talk about it, no one took me seriously.
Very accurate. I was living in Houston when Sandy Hook happened. The unbelievable response I heard over and over again from Texans was "this is why we need more guns". It's a bizarre place.
Thank you for writing this. When I had my son 16 months ago, I felt exactly the same way for the first few weeks. I thought I had been tricked and lied to by all the other mums saying motherhood was the best thing ever. I found myself thinking I had made a huge mistake. And it wasn't just the sleep deprivation or the breastfeeding or nappies or all the things I was expecting, but the complete loss of my former life. From big things like dropping my career, to small things like not being able to dress the way I used to, keep the house as clean as I would like, cook the food I used to, maintain my interests and hobbies - everything changed for me, and that was hard, particularly as very little changed for my partner. I wish other mothers had talked about this more instead of perpetuating the motherhood myth, as I felt so ashamed.