User Comments

k8mer June 21, 2023

This is hard to read as an adoptee. While I understand mothering a difficult child is challenging, a biological mother simply would not get the same support as this mother did, nor should she. She was right about one thing, this shouldn’t be about her, it should be about the traumatised child she chose to raise. Adoption is held up as this paragon, like it saves children and anyone who adopts is a saint. It’s simply not true. All adoption stems from loss and grief. 

k8mer November 11, 2022

@zylpen37 that’s the only movie I ever walked out of too. I sat in the upstairs foyer at the Astor in Melbourne, talking to the guy at the candy bar and patting the Astor cat. Much more enjoyable than the movie. 

k8mer June 16, 2022

I mean, isn’t this just being a Mum? I work part

time and my husband works from home, 9-5, and I still do all of the things mentioned in this article. We often joke that if I die, he’s screwed because he doesn’t even know which energy provider we are with. Of course it’s funnier to him than it is to me since I’m the one doing all the work. 

k8mer September 27, 2021

Unfortunately for me, my mother is the one who behaves this way. I feel so sorry for my sisters in law. She is absolutely vile to them. There’s a photo of her at my brother’s wedding, screaming in his face because she didn’t praise her enough in his wedding speech. She’s a a raging narcissist and now she’s 84 and wonders why no one wants her to live with them. 

k8mer July 10, 2021

I have one son who is heading into high school next year. My husband and I only ever wanted one child. Our little family is awesome and I’ve never regretted not going again. However, people STILL ask me if we are going to have another one. Uh, I’m 49 and well and truly menopausal so that’s a resounding no. I’ve spent a decade explaining my choice but I did find “I nearly died in childbirth” was a fairly compelling answer that put an end to the conversation. But why did I feel like I had to explain that choice? 

k8mer June 13, 2021

This sounds like something my mother would say. She’s “old school” aka, a misogynist. You hate to see it in a woman but sadly, many older women have a very low bar set for their expectations of men. My mother constantly goes on and on about how hard it is for my husband to work a full time job… like no one else does it. She barely acknowledges the fact that I work 4 days a week AND run the entire household on top of that, which technically equates to way more than a full time job. I used to bite my tongue and let her feel sorry for my “poor husband working so hard”, now I just say “he works the same as everyone else and doesn’t have to commute. He’s fine.”

k8mer April 19, 2021

I think it’s been pretty evident for some time that the MAFS “experts” are matching certain people to create drama for the season, not because they think those people are in any way compatible. I couldn’t watch last season because of the experts’ complete lack of regard for Heidi’s well-being the season before - we all watched Mike treat Heidi like an hysterical harpy and Sir John repeatedly ask Heidi “how are we going to stop you from over-reacting to Mike treating you like your feelings are unimportant and your sole purpose is to make him feel good?” 

But, while it is the nature of the show to create drama for ratings, there are certain personalities that go on the show for publicity, to raise their profile, who can take a fake television relationship at face value and use it to boost their Insta following... then there are people like Melissa who are on the show to find love because their unbelievably terrible track record has left them emotionally depleted. And yeah, f*ck the experts (and by experts I mean producers because let’s face it, there’s no way in hell the experts have any actual say in who gets cast) for preying on vulnerable people just for the sake of some advertising dollars. If you’re going to do that while parading out these
 so called experts, at least make them work for their 
pay checks by dishing out actual relationship advice, not just sound bytes at the commitment ceremonies each week. 

k8mer April 18, 2021

Love the recaps, really going to miss them. 

And now to Bec. You know I feel like she has gotten a pass this whole season despite the fact that she spent the whole time leading Jake on and gaslighting him like it was her job. Every time they would get close she would find a ridiculous and petty excuse to push him away and then she would act like the injured party. I felt like I was taking crazy pills when literally no one was calling her out for her behaviour. Does she get a pass because she’s a woman? I do not get it. While her behaviour wasn’t quite as bad as Bryce’s, she definitely got what she deserved finally, but it really felt too little, too late. 

k8mer April 7, 2021

I’ll admit, I have a hard time feeling sympathy for someone who is part of a family who is responsible  for promoting and encouraging impossible body standards and has made an obscene amount of money off the self esteem of girls and women. 

k8mer April 7, 2021

I once shared with a mother’s group that my husband and I slept in separate beds. I joked that it was for his safety because I would smother him in his sleep because of his snoring. I was 100% shamed by this group of women, all of them judged me and my relationship and felt the need to list all of the reasons why separate bedrooms meant my relationship was doomed. Not all of them spoke, but several vocal ones were nodded along with. Needless to say, I stopped attending that group several weeks later. They were not my people. My husband and I have been together for another 10 years since that conversation, in fact we’ve been together for 22 years this year. Our sex life is great, we are also very good friends and laugh together all the time, none of which would be true if he kept me awake with his snoring every night. 


k8mer February 23, 2021

My God, those baggy jeans are not flattering to anyone, trust me, Gen X lived through that in the early 90’s. If you’re skinny, they make you look fat, if you’re even slightly overweight, they make you look huge. Awful. So are the ankle freezers. Right up there with the open toed boots that were trendy a few years back. Yech. 

k8mer January 11, 2021

I am friends with a Mum who loves spending time with her 3 kids, hates the end of school holidays and loved homeschooling and I’ve never heard her complain about her kids. I have another friend with 3 kids who are 100% a massive handful who would drive the best parent on the planet absolutely insane. Personally, I love my kid and I actually like him too and I enjoy his company, but I am aware that I only have one and anything beyond that becomes more challenging. As much as I love him, I complain about him when I catch up with other Mums because it is the only time I can vent about those annoying little things he does. And to be fair, I complain about my husband to those women too. This article comes across as pretty judgemental, and while that may not be your intention, you say that your kids drive you nuts sometimes too. Instead of judging the other mothers for complaining about their kids, maybe recognise that these gatherings are their only outlets for these complaints. Frankly, no one else wants to hear it. They probably love their kids and enjoy spending time with them too but when they’ve spent the day at each other’s throats, as they often do, it’s natural to want to vent about it. Maybe show some compassion and empathy for your peers rather than assuming they actually hate their kids and are bad parents for wanting a glass of wine at the end of a long day of homeschooling.

k8mer January 3, 2021

I recently had my second Mirena inserted. The first 5 years were great and definitely helped reduce the amount of migraines I used to get on the pill. I had mine inserted after I’d had a baby so it was a fairly easy procedure that only felt slightly more invasive than a Pap smear. Any discomfort was taken care of with some ibuprofen. 


After about a year, my periods were more like spotting and I hardly had any other symptoms. The second insertion was so easy, my doctor kept asking “are you ok? Are you sure you’re ok?” Yeah, I was totally fine - I had taken pre-emptive ibuprofen under her advice. I’ve had a weird reaction this time, potentially because of the new surge of progesterone it provides, causing migraines for a few days but it seems to have settled down now. 

I would also give the Mirena 5 stars, especially after my experiences on the pill and Implanon - I had a period every 2 weeks for a year on the implant, it sucked! I have recommended Mirena to loads of people too.