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latinalove March 4, 2021

I am a Latina living in Canada, I knew that cultural differences were a barrier but in this case he used it toxically against me. I was going through a divorce and chatting with several guys (mostly Argentines). I always left my partners and I always said that when it happens to me it would be fatal. One day my friend told me: you have to meet this boy, he is super cute and he is for you. And he was. We connect instantly, especially sexually. He does not have social networks and the time that we used to spend together was always limited by work and children of both, the temporary texts weren't very long and I was comfortable with that because my other relationships were still very sticky and I got bored and left them. He didn't use to talk much, I admit that sex occupied most of our time, But when he finally spoke, it was to be toxic. His daughters live in another province of Canada and he told me "I hope you make the effort to come and see me." And I went. He began to question me that the photos I sent him had been during the day and it was at night, therefore they were not for him. That my divorce was not finished yet and that I could consider cheating on my ex. His daughters knew about me, and he even said about spending Christmas all together (after 2 months). After he stopped mentioning it and when he flew to spend Christmas with his daughters, the texts began to be less. After 3 months, it was the first time we didn't text each other every day. And he told me not to send him photos with my children, to send him only photos of me when he did send me photos with his daughters. He met my friends for Thanksgiving and spoke to his brother on the 

phone. She introduced me to the whole world as the girl with the beautiful accent who has two degrees and works and it is the first time that a woman has not asked her for her credit card. I always thought in my head to have a conversation with him but then I just wanted to be with him and not ruin the moment or feel what I felt with my ex guys. Finally, by the end of the year, we spent it together and he didn't even say happy new year or give me a gift for Christmas, and that night he told me "don't come from my side of the bed, look at all the space you have". I went from his house and sent him a text: I love you but I have to let you go. He said ok and sent me the things he had at home by mail. I was devastated, I wanted a response, a signal of care, something. I always thought it was because his ex took the girls away and he was sad or he was going through a millionaire divorce. He is hilling, I thought. I sent him two messages that week, he answered the last one that he missed but that it was better that way. I waited a few more days and I told him that I had to take a product close to his house, he told me that we could see each other (obviously, the sex was too good) and I went. He did not want to speak. But since I was busy with the university, I didn't detect that he wasn't hugging me or kissing me or anything. I wait for Valentine, if I didn't have a message, I was going to definitely leave it. He sent me a cold message and told him that it would be his valentine, I bought him a chair (that he wanted) and I went. he dindt give me nothing, not even a glass of wine. And the last thing was this weekend (we were 6 months old) i signed us up to do a wine sommelier course together (very expensive) and at the break he said he didn't like it and that he would wait for me in a bar until I left. When I went to the bar I was completely drunk and they kicked us out. He is an entrepreneur, he earns a lot of money, I feel like he felt very embarrassed, I drove us and I didn't want to talk about it. It was also the first time i didn't wanted to have sex with him. I broke down in tears and said finally, let's talk for the first time in 6 months. He never answered me if she was the girlfriend or if he loved me and that if I finally got a divorce, we were not going to get married because he already has 2 divorces. Marriage was something I never said and they were all assumptions she made in her crazy head. I feel like I was with someone I don't know at all and I didn't even mention to anyone that we got kicked out to preserve our privacy, not even my best friend. I don't understand how he can have successful businesses and have so little tact for love. He has told me that I am dramatic and emotional and all these months the only thing I did was bite my tongue to not speak or complain. I rescue that I always spend the times that I had free, never excuses or a no and that it is super frontal and honest. Like every woman (the one who says no, lie) I stalked her ex because I needed answers. She has a blog and I saw from her wedding photos and I know in detail how they met. I hate myself because today I could be pregnant (like her ex got, quick) and I'm not because I got an IUD right away and was careful. He never took it into account, never a merit of me being responsible and healthy. I know he knows who I am, that I study, work hard, I am a mother and responsible, I am a psychologist and I hate myself more because I always said "it will never happen to me, I will never have doubts about a man." I also have to be honest with myself and say that I was disappointed being drunk and something in my attraction changed, but I also know that I need help. I know that he is very proud and although he is dying he will not call me and I know that there are no other women, he never touches the phone except for work. 

He left on Sunday after his drunkenness, he did not text on Monday, Tuesday and he wrote "how are you making out" and respond that I missed him but I needed to know what he wanted, he told me "its all good sexy, you are beautiful". Avoiding everything. Yesterday Wednesday I called and did not answer. I know it's in oil fields with no sign, And I know you don't want to talk about what happened on the weekend that was mixed with all of the above, I know that it is not for me and that it will not change, but as I never thought it would happen to me, I need that: it does not go any more. And he won't say it.
I haven't been ghosting yet, but the few messages are something like that. And I already promised myself not to write to him.

Thanks for reading me, I need to express it.