Falling pregnant was such a joy and in between violent bouts of morning sickness, I felt really happy. I couldn’t wait until my tummy swell and my skin glowed. I couldn’t wait until I got that line from my belly button down to my hoo-ha.
I looked forward to every change I imagined would happen to my body and in the movie in my head, it was wonderful. And in that totally incorrect movie in my head, mere days after giving birth, my body would snap back into shape and everyone would exclaim, “Oh wow, you look sooooooo skinny”.
This belly will gone soon.
So convinced was I that I would spring back into shape, that I packed my hospital bag with pre-pregnancy clothes. Yep. I did that.
The reality was rather different. It’s been three years since I gave birth to my last child and I am still dealing with the after-effects.
Here are 8 things I wish I’d known would change about my body when I became a mum. Brace yourself…
Just as an FYI, this post is sponsored by PeriCoach. But all opinions expressed by the author are 100 per cent authentic and written in their own words.
1. My stomach has a turkey gobble.
After my first child I had a small amount of loose skin on my lower tummy that I couldn’t get rid of. After my second it seemed a little looser but I tried not to think about it.
After my third child, my lower tummy now has a pronounced turkey gobble. I can no longer wear low rise jeans. Everything has to be mid rise and control top and shaping.
On the up side, the kids love it. My daughter in particular, who being my third child really is responsible for the state of my stomach in my eyes, loves to play with it, while I secretly save up for a tummy tuck.
2. My bladder is easily frightened.
Years later and I still don’t have the control over my bladder I used to have. I have to wear a liner EVERY DAY and any time I cough, sneeze, jump or get up from a chair too fast I’m incredibly happy it is there.
Why have I lost so much bladder control? Why, why, why? Oh, I know why. It was those babies I carried who played trampolines on my pelvic floor.
Did you have fun, kids? Did you have a good time? Good. Well worth mummy wetting herself then.
But all jokes aside, Urinary Stress Incontinence doesn’t have to be a normal part of life. It’s NOT normal to wet your pants or have wear pads for this when you’re an adult and nor should you put up with it. We’re grown women, after all. If this is a problem for you too, do your research, because there are ways to help.
3. My hair is much, much thinner.
During each pregnancy my hair would become thick and shiny and full. Thank you, hormones. However in the weeks after giving birth, clumps of it would fall out.
Thanks you, hormones.
My hair is now decidedly thinner than before I was a mum and all my hairstyles involve styles that exaggerate it’s fullness like using volumisers, drying it with my head upside down, gentle teasing and lots of treatments.
4. Boobs, what boobs?
I no longer have boobs. I have socks with tennis balls in them attached to my chest. When I lie down on my back they fall under my arms. Then, they look like fried eggs.
Where art thou, my breasts? I used to be a D cup. Now I’m an optimistic B, or a B with padding. It really is quite sad.