For some couples, post baby sex can seem daunting – or even downright impossible.
But now, we have some good news: according to sex and relationship expert Dr Laura Berman, sex post-baby can be just as satisfying as it was before your little bundle arrived.
Phew.
She recently shared her four top tips with Us Magazine.
1. Remember to be realistic.
Look - we're not going to lie. Things do change once a baby arrives. But the key is to accept that instead of fighting it.
“Accept that you are both going to be a little grouchy and not making out like teenagers...But ask yourself: What can I do instead? I can’t have wild, passionate sex right now, but I can give him one long hug and just say, ‘Thank you for being my husband," Dr Berman says.
2. Consider your hormones.
When you have a baby, your body is flooded with oxytocin, which is a chemical that makes you feel all cuddly, and helps the mum-and-baby bond. however, it also counteracts testosterone, the hormone that boosts your sex drive.
Dr Berman says it also affects new dads too.
“Research has shown that new dads have higher oxytocin and lower testosterone levels, and that the more hands on a dad is with the daily care of his child, the lower his levels are likely to be...So basically, an involved, loving daddy is probably going to have a much lower sex drive than he normally does.”
3. Get creative.
Find new ways to spend quality (and romantic) time with your partner - even if that means letting household chores slide.
“Remember to be gentle with yourself...You are going to have limited time as a new parent, so ask yourself: Do I want to spend my time picking up toys and making complicated dinners, or would I rather enjoy time with my partner and order takeout?” Dr Berman says.
"And keep in mind: This stage isn’t forever. Some day you will look back and it will have seemed so fleeting."
4. Have a plan.
Dr Berman recommends coming up with one clear relationship goal - and sticking to it.
“For example, your goal might be ‘I want to make out or connect physically on a daily basis,’” she says.
So there you have it - four easy steps to better sex (baby and all).
You're so welcome.
How did you stay connected to your partner post-baby?