Sometimes, these are the only words you need to hear. So why isn’t anyone saying it?
It was an article I shared on my Facebook page that started it. The article’s premise was that people who work full-time cannot claim to be full-time parents too.
One of my friends, clearly fatigued by the whole ‘people judging parents’ thing responded with:
“What I’d like to see is an article that says ‘You are doing the best thing you know how to. Good on you.’”
And it struck me that she had a point.
Now I realise if we weren’t allowed to make sweeping generalisations on the internet, then nothing would ever get published. But one sweeping generalisation you don’t see very often is this one:
When it comes to parenting we’re all doing the best we can … and for the most part, ‘the best we can’ is pretty bloody good.
Everyone has an opinion about how best to manage the tension between working and parenting.
And everyone has an opinion about what ‘good’ parents do and don’t do.
But here’s the thing that sweeping generalisations about parenting don’t take into account. We all have a story and all our stories are different.
Here’s my story.
I’m a married mother of two. My kids are (nearly) five and (just turned) one. My husband Ant and I own two businesses. He’s in the office every day managing the operational side of things. I alternate between working from my home on my son’s school days, and in the office on the other days.Ant and I each work 60 odd hours a week and our kids are either in school or care during working hours. So when on earth do we see them?
Well we see them in the morning before school/day care. And we see them in the afternoon. We try to be home at 5pm at the latest so we have two hours with them before they go to bed at 7/7.30pm.
Once they’re in bed however it’s back to work for us.