by KATE HUNTER
When I was at school, we were taught that after we die, we go to heaven.
Heaven was presented as a cloudy (but not rainy) place where everyone wore white and got to look upon the face of God.
Back then, no correspondence was entered into, either in the classroom or at home so I never voiced the many aspects of heaven that troubled me:
1. If you live for all eternity when you get there, do you stay the age you were when you died? Not much fun if you kicked the bucket it at 97. Do you get to nominate an age, say 24, and stay that forever?
2. Is it awkward if you had been widowed and you catch up with your previous spouse in heaven – who do you spend the time with. Will spouse number one feel you moved on too quickly?
3. How do you find your loved ones? And do you have to hang out together all the time? Wouldn’t that be like one never-ending Christmas dinner i.e. hell?
4. How does heaven cater to all tastes? If your concept of paradise is water-skiing all day, how is that facilitated without upsetting the souls who want to read or watch movies. Is heaven like a giant cruise-ship, with something for everyone?
5. No offence God, but after we’ve seen your face (is the reveal like on The Voice?)surely heaven is a bit, um, boring? Eternity is a lot of time to fill up. It’s, like, an eternity.
Of course, now I realise that even to the very religious among us, heaven is a not a physical place.
Top Comments
Great article and whilst I know it is a bit toungue in cheek, I am going to throw in my thoughts too!
Us in our current forms (ie a soul living inside a body) are unable to understand the afterlife just like someone born blind can't understand what it's like to see.
I believe our feelings and emotions and personality are from our soul and the physical sensations and our logic and reason comes through our body. Therefore when we part from our bodies, it is impossible to experience things like time, boredom, feel fluffy clouds, eat food, be a certain age and any other hobbies people are looking forward to
I'm an atheist.
I just want peace and quiet.