We need to talk about the mental load of Pride Month.

Pride Month is a time when we honour the endless pursuit of civil rights for our community. 

It’s an ode to the many LGBTQIA+ people before us who have fought, often in the face of extreme violence and hostility, for acceptance and love. It’s a loud, joyous cry of celebration and inclusion for the current community living their life. 

And, it’s a time of incredible, debilitating fatigue for many. I can’t speak for all queer people, but the mental load of being a political pawn and used for profit tinges the edges of my every day.

The way I am, the way that I love, and the way I choose to live my life (with an incredible, loving, female partner) are debated daily. It’s poked at, scorned at, and prodded with so much cold, cruel hatred every day and though I try, I can’t ever escape it.

Watch: #LoveSpeech: LGBT people's real names they're called. Story continues after video.

So, when Pride Month comes and is used as an excuse, a party, or a way to make money… I feel icky. 

Because, I know that by the end of June, when Pride Month is ending and the world is moving on, I’ll still be here in the rainbow-coloured fight, jarred by the silence. Like being met by eerie quietness after leaving a concert. Though I will continue to speak up long after Pride Month ends, most of the other public ‘support’ will fade away and I’ll be met with phrases like, “You are now fully accepted and equal, we just had pride month!” from some that think queer hate is just something that happens in far-right America. 

So, what started Pride Month anyway? 

It’s not a month chosen at random. 

On the 28th June 1969, there was a catalytic sort of event that spurred to motion a worldwide LGBTQIA+ movement; known as the Stonewall Riots. On this date, NYC police raided a gay club called the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich Village, New York. Unlike other raids before though, the patrons fought back. Many call this the spark that set alight the gay rights movement in the US, Australia, and across the globe, and it is this day that is honoured every Pride Month. 

What will Pride Month look like this year in Australia?

In Sydney, we have the Sydney Pride Festival, made up of various queer events and starting at the Stonewall Hotel on June 1st. Across the other Aussie states, there are an array of queer events to attend during the month of June. 

On top of events, Pride Month sees the release of ‘pride collections,’ where brands release their annual rainbow-themed collections in honour of the month. The brands that do it properly, and who don’t just do it for profits alone, give a certain amount of their profits from their collections to LGBTQIA+ charities and initiatives. 

How can we appropriately celebrate and support?

There are so many tangible things that can be done, below are some ideas to get started:

• Take in the statistics and do your own independent reading or listening, so you can remain aware of what is happening to our LGBTQIA+ community.

• Check on your LGBTQIA+ friends and family because conversations around our community will have a chokehold on us over the next month, and we are drained already.

• Push for inclusivity and diversity in your workplace and/or community, especially after Pride Month ends.

• Call people out, even if they are friends or family. This should not only be the responsibility of the queer community. 

• Ask. When in doubt, ask and communicate. Open dialogue is a step towards progress. 

Listen to No Filter, This is an episode about pronouns but it’s not really. It’s actually about love and shame and freedom and acceptance and painful struggles and life-changing revelations. Post continues below.

The point of me writing this is not to deter people from showing their support. It’s about further raising awareness and putting forward the reminder that we have a long way to go towards LGBTQIA+ acceptance and equal rights.

Just look at what’s happening to our trans and queer family in America, where there are 452 anti-LGBTQIA+ bills (118 are anti-trans health care bills). Or, closer to home, where there are queer-owned businesses being vandalised, where there is an ongoing Special Commission of Inquiry into LGBTQIA+ hate crimes investigating unsolved suspected hate crime deaths of LGBTQIA+ people in NSW between 1970 and 2010. Or, where political party leaders (the people meant to represent our nation) tweet homophobic remarks willy-nilly. 

The point is that homophobia, biphobia and transphobia is still rampant, and sometimes it feels like only queer people remember that 365 days of the year. 

Note: I take an intersectional approach when looking at marginalisation and discrimination, so I feel it’s important to note that I speak only from the point of view of being a cis, white, queer woman. Those with multiple, intersecting identities will possibly feel this strain on a higher and/or different level, and deserve to speak on that of their own accord.

Feature Image: Supplied