No matter how complex the reasons, there always seems to be one, defining moment that signifies the end of a relationship.
When you’re 16 and have been going out for two weeks, it can be a bad haircut or a questionable pair of shoes. But when your relationship is more mature, it can be quite an insightful moment that leads you to decide it’s time to move on.
In a recent Reddit thread, anonymous users shared the moment they realised they had married the wrong person. The result is a number of raw, honest stories about the importance of trusting your instincts, looking after yourself, and acknowledging when you’ve grown apart from someone you once loved.
Here are some of the replies:
A month in.
“A month after we were married, I found out she was going to a coworker’s house for some 1 on 1 time. The divorce papers filings lasted longer than the marriage did.”
When she loved herself more than me.
“Actually it took several years. When she told me she and her sisters, her parents, and the kids were taking a vacation. She told me I was not invited. I would never have considered taking a vacation without her. That is when I realised I loved her far more than she loved me.”
The day I married him.
"He was late getting to the ceremony site, and I was so.. just.. .relived. Almost giddy. There had been doubts for months leading up to the ceremony, and when I tried to talk to my mother about my reservations she told me that I had to go through with it, because of how much money that had been spent. I was young, and still gave a shit about making other people happy."
When he abused me.
"Marriage lasted 3 years. I left when he broke my collarbone by throwing me against the wall."
When I wasn't excited.
"I was getting married and thought "Huh. I thought I'd be more excited. Maybe it'll come later."
Spoiler alert. It didn't."
When I realised he was neglecting our child.
"After cheating on me the second time, I realised he cared very little about my feelings or the relationship in general. I dealt with that, though, as we had a child and I could put the hurt away for the kid.
Finally left when I realised he had been neglecting our son while I was away at work (he was out of a job and had been for months). Quote from child that really made me decide to leave the ex- 'Mummy, can I always go to work with you? Daddy just sleeps and sometimes I get hungry and can't reach the bread.'
We did talk about this, and he always denied it. I tested the asshole the next day. Woke the ex up, told him I was leaving for work and he needed to wake up to be with our son (I went to work at 2:30pm almost every day.) I took the kid to work with me. Didn't hear from the ex until 8pm and that's only because I texted him and asked how our kid was. "He's fine. He is playing video games in the room." I informed him the child was with me. Good times."

Top Comments
It's kind of hard to believe in some of these instances that there weren't warning signs before these trigger points, especially these days where people generally live together before getting married. It's not like our parents' days where you didn't get these insights until after marriage.
A few things turned the red light on for me: realising that he was arguing the point with me about trivial things just for the sport of arguing & winning the fight, when he quit his job 1 week after I had birthed our 2nd child & expected me to go back to work straight away, when I had a broken ankle in plaster & was 7 mths pregnant he sent me back to work as well as making me do ironing for other people, when my parents separated & his advice to my dad was "shit happens". It took 7 years but I eventually felt strong enough to leave & haven't regretted it for 1 second.