Oh goodness! It’s been a long five sleeps…
Tonight, we begin with Jess and Dave drinking at 9am in a desperate attempt to forget the dance that took place at their wedding.
The experts attempt to remind us of the very scientific, very rigorous nature of this whole experience, saying "all participants have successfully completed phase one of the experiment."
Okay. First, it's not 'phase one', IT'S A FAKE WEDDING. We know, we were there.
And two, this is Not. An. Experiment.
In New Zealand, things are a little... tense on Craig and Andy's honeymoon. You see, it's Andy. He snores. And as we all know, snoring is one of the most annoying/torturous habits a human being can possess. The snorer is fast asleep, with a look of smugness on their face, while you lay WIDE AWAKE calculating just how little sleep you're going to get.
We discuss Dan, and the end of the honeymoon phase on the latest episode of The Binge. Post continues below.
The worst type of snorer is the kind who denies they're doing it - but luckily Andy is no bullsh*t. He says, "I know I snore. I've admitted that. He went into the other room to sleep." Awks.
We meet Nicole and Keller on their honeymoon in the goddamn Cook Islands. There's a lengthy montage of them kissing in the water, running along the sand, trying to kiss under water and nearly drowning, etc. We can't help but wonder how the camera person actually gets half those shots...