I’m just going to come out and say it: modern dating is creating a generation of liars.
I don’t mean this in the way you might think. Yes, people might airbrush themselves a little in their profiles, or just go all out and catfish unsuspecting victims. We know this. But the fact is, you won’t get very far with your fabrications once you’ve pencilled in an actual real life date with a prospective partner.
I’m not talking about the various fibs daters are telling each other, but the lies couples are telling everyone else.
Internet dating is everywhere. If you’re single, you’re swiping. Between the likes of Tinder, Bumble, RSVP and eHarmony, we’re spoilt for choice these days.
Yet few friends are telling me they met their new flames on these services, and those who do tell me they met on Tinder usually admit to hiding the truth from their families. I smell a fish.
Either these apps are failing hard to actually spark romances, or I’m being told porkies. And research tells me the former is unlikely.
According to a 2015 study by eHarmony seen by Mamamia, online dating was the second most common way survey respondents met their current partners, at 22 per cent, nipping at the heels of those who said they met through mutual friends, at 24 per cent.
I asked a mate to tell me to what extent she is going to hide the true ‘how we met’ story.
I was one of the lucky few who got the facts: she met her new boyfriend on Tinder.
Most family and friends are under the impression she met him at the beach — where they actually had their first date — or at a bar. He says the same.
Watch: Mamamia staff reveal some of their worst first dates. (Post continues after video.)
“For fear of judgment, and because it’s not a very exciting story… It’s nice to have a good story that goes along with how you met the person you fall in love with.”
My friend says she feels bad when she lies. And it doesn’t come without its complications: she has to keep a mind-map of to whom she has told what.
“When you don’t feel good about it, it’s like, ‘Oh, yep, I lied to them’, then it’s easy to remember who.”
She doesn’t know if she’ll ever confess, saying she feels it’s entirely possible to sustain the lie.