
I remember the first time someone asked me how lesbians have sex.
I was at work and had recently come out when one of the surgeons I worked with asked me how I was enjoying the other side of the fence and if I could give him a little insight into what happens behind closed doors.
Appalled and humiliated I laughed off the question because I was a baby dyke and I was still figuring it out for myself. So I declined to answer to which the surgeon proceeded to mash both of his hands together in a very aggressive scissoring motion. *insert eye-roll here*.
To be honest, back then I didn’t even know if lesbians scissored. I had literally just met my first girlfriend, and that was all ahead of me.
But here I am 10 years later with a bit more insight and a lot more experience, so let us enlighten the world with the ins and outs of sapphic relations and debunk a few myths while we’re here.
Lesbian Sex Myth #1: Lesbian sex isn’t real sex.
Let’s get this one out of the way shall we? Lesbian sex is 100% real sex.
Who gets to decide what real sex is, anyway? If your definition of sex is a penis in a vagina, then I pity you because my God there is a whole world out there waiting to be discovered and a lot more orgasms.
Hands, tongues, genitalia, erogenous zones... a lesbian couple has everything a straight couple has (except maybe an appendage, but that’s easily fixed).
Quick side note: Have a listen to Mamamia's Overshare podcast, where Kelly, Flex and Lem discuss whether kissing always leads to sex. Post continues after podcast.
Many of us have sexual urges and like to rub our erogenous zones together from time to time. The rubbing, stimulating, licking and sucking of various body parts does indeed make us feel tingly, wet and we do cum. And if the research in this field is anything to go by women in same-sex relationships orgasm more than straight women so even if it’s not 'real sex' I’ll stick to my version.
The bottom line is if you’re horny and it feels good then it’s probably sex.
Lesbian Sex Myth #2: Lesbians are all 'tight'.
Why is it that people assume that just because someone hasn’t had a penis inside of them recently that they are tight? More importantly, why do we place such a moral value on the diameter of a women’s vagina?
Fun fact: Vaginas dilate both when aroused and during childbirth, so move on.