At 30-years-old Kasey Chambers was newly married, a mum to four-year-old son Talon and an award winning singer-songwriter.
She also weighed only 44 kilos.
Her 2001 album, Barricades & Brickwalls went seven times platinum, and the single Not Pretty Enough shot straight to number one on the ARIA singles chart.
But with an enormous amount of success, came overwhelming pressure.
“I just didn’t feel myself and I knew that something wasn’t right…I just couldn’t admit to myself that that is what it was,” Chambers told Mia Freedman on Mamamia’s No Filter podcast.
She felt as though her life was spiralling out of control, she couldn’t say ‘no’ to people, and she began to resent music.
The one thing she could control was what she put into her mouth.
Kasey Chambers speaks to Mia Freedman about her experience with an eating disorder. Post continues below.
Her eating disorder, a mix of bulimia and anorexia, wasn’t motivated by body dissatisfaction.
“I wouldn’t look in the mirror and see someone really fat,” she told Freedman.
“I didn’t want to look in the mirror. It wasn’t an image thing for me,” she said. “It wasn’t ‘Oh I look fat in photos’. It was more about the control thing.”
At her lowest, Chambers was 10 kilos under her ideal body weight. Her friends and family became increasingly concerned about her thin frame, insisting that she didn’t look well.
And despite agreeing that she didn’t look healthy, she just couldn’t bring herself to eat.
When people asked what was wrong, Chambers felt like she didn’t have the language to explain it. “It couldn’t be that”, she thought. “Everything pointed to ‘nah, that’s not me'” – eating disorders don’t happen to 30-year-old women.