By KATE LEAVER
This is why we can’t have nice things, Australia.
An actual real life politician said live on radio that she wants a rich lover with a big dick.
This politician. Jacqui Lambie, who was elected as senator for Tasmania in last year’s election. That is to say, someone with a mandate and a voice in our federal parliament.
The 43-year-old Palmer United Party Senator described her ideal man to radio hosts Kim and Dave:
“They must have heaps of cash and they’ve got to have a package between their legs, let’s be honest. I don’t need them to speak, they don’t even need to speak.”
Well look, the woman knows what she wants. She’s honest, you’ve got to give her that… Ah, bugger it, no, Jacqui Lambie, it was disgraceful. What are you, auditioning for The Real Housewives of Canberra? Have some dignity.
But wait, there’s more. Things got even less appropriate when 22-year-old listener Jamie called into the station to offer the package between his legs to Senator Lambie.
If you don’t believe me, here’s the audio:
Jacqui, woman after the nation’s heart, had a few questions for the young man before she accepted a ‘breakfast date’ with him.
“Do you have plenty of cash?” she asked. “I’m just a bit concerned that at 22 years of age and living in Tasmania you might not be quite there yet.”
And then: “I’m just a bit concerned because you’re so young, I’m not sure you’d be able to handle Jacqui Lambie.”
AND THEN: “Are you well-hung?”
Jamie, bless his heart, assures Jacqui: “Like a donkey.”
So, yeah. That happened. Live on radio. With an actual human being who sits in Australian parliament.
When we know exactly how our Prime Minister would react, can we really expect any better?
Ah yeah, we should.
We’re always saying we wish our politicians were more honest.
We’re always on about how refreshing it would be if politicians spoke openly, candidly, and without spin.
THIS IS NOT WHAT WE MEAN, JACQUI LAMBIE.
This is not what we mean.