There is a criteria for those who are qualified to talk about motherhood. Just being a mother in itself doesn’t cut it.
Journalist Jacinta Tynan blew apart the parenting community back in 2010 when she wrote a column (called ‘The Big Easy’) about how she finds motherhood a ‘breeze’ and doesn’t understand what all the fuss is about. You can read that post here.
Her article hit like a nuclear bomb. Jacinta was flooded with hundreds of comments with readers furious with the suggestion that motherhood wasn’t one very tough gig.
Jacinta, now the mother of two young sons, has just written a book about her mothering experience (so far) called Mother Zen, exploring why some of us find being a mother so joyous and trouble free, while so many others are up against it.
Here is an edited excerpt from Mother Zen:
One thing I learned from being the focal point of a mass mother meltdown was that for some women motherhood is an exclusive club. According, at least, to a considerable number of the mothers who comment on online portals, there are criteria for those who are qualified to say anything on the topic. Just being a mother in itself doesn’t cut it.
You can’t possibly know what you’re talking about unless your baby is one, two, started school, or reached puberty. You must have more than one baby, preferably two, four or, better still, six. Don’t even think about chiming in unless you’re a stay-at-home mum, according to some. Or work and juggle childcare, according to others. One woman suggested I wouldn’t have any idea about being a parent until my child had left home, got married and had children of his own. Which leaves a very narrow sample of those deemed to have a legitimate opinion on motherhood! Best you keep mum.