
Can I get a little respect for my friends? I’m tired of having to defend some of my favourite people simply because of the way the earn their living.
You see, over the years through my work I have interviewed many sex workers. One in particular, Christine, I have grown to regard as a close and loyal mate.
She is at the top of her field, earning thousands a night. She doesn’t dislike her job or find it degrading as many assume she must. Instead, she sees her body as her own business, literally and metaphorically. She claims she is in charge, always, and will never do anything she doesn’t want to. Her work, she believes, is empowering and necessary.
And I say good on her.
This lady isn’t the only sex worker I have grown close to however. Upon moving o Melbourne some five years ago I made a friend in a woman called Tracy Connelly, who worked the corner close to my home. Every day while walking my dog I would chat to Tracy, who was always witty and warm.
Hey Mia Freedman, is it true you don’t like sex workers? (Post continues after video.)
To say I was devastated when she was brutally robbed, raped and murdered one cold winter night three years ago doesn’t fully explain my heartache. This horrific event changed my life and led me to become involved with the St Kilda Gatehouse, a safe place for street based sex workers that offers much needed sanctuary and dignity.
I truly respect and cherish both Christine and the women I have met through the Gatehouse. But I am fed up with the fact others don’t.
There is an underlying prejudice that exists around women who engage in sex work and that is that they are somehow less than us, dirty and depraved or pathetic and pitiful. It is a bias that I believe is undeserved and ignorant. But here is the paradox that is often overlooked – it is also blatantly sexist.
Why is it that women who rent their bodies are condemned for their actions and not the men that hire them for their enjoyment? Why is someone who gives demonised and not those that receive?
I used to see Tracy’s customers pull up, often with kid seats in the back of their cars. These were men who have families, jobs and socially acceptable lives.
In Tracy’s case, these men knew she was hopelessly addicted to heroin and recognised the danger she placed herself in working the streets. They would have probably surmised her habit stopped her from getting work in a reputable brothel and that there was probably a tragic back story to her life that led to said addiction. Which there was and almost always is.
Top Comments
My granny used to say "if you can give it away, why can't you sell it" and I say "it's the persons body and it's their choice".
I don't judge anyone, however, I have concerns about sex workers who don't do this out of choice, but this can be said of any job.
Discrimination has no place in our society (how does judgement or discrimination ever help) as long as the women have access to services, should they decide they want to change their line of work, it's no ones business but their own.
I work in a healthcare & counselling environment for women in one of our major cities for the past 15+ years, we see a lot of sex workers. I'm yet to meet a sex worker with even moderately good self esteem and a truly reasonable level of happiness. I emphasise "truly" when one digs a little deeper.
From high flyer to street worker, same. It would be extraordinary to meet a truly happy, well adjusted female sex worker. Even ladies not seeking counselling (yet) and just our physical health services have all sorts of emotional type problems, lots of abuse history, common, there seems to always be a certain level of feeling internally "crap" about oneself.
If this story of the friend is truly, truly, true then I shall run around the block naked, and I'm not a runner! I find it hard to believe but of course, not saying it's impossible. I would suggest your friend is not revealing everything to you, as is her right to do. Nice story though.
So you're saying that you work in a counselling centre and everyone you meet needs counselling? How unusual that isn't. What exactly do the patients' careers have to do with anything other than your prejudices?
It sounds like you need to get out of your office building and meet a more typical cross section of people, including sex workers. You'll find many of them who are perfectly happy with their choice of profession. All they want is for people like you to stop judging them for what they do and stop trying to interfere with their work under the excuse of "rescuing" them when that's the last thing they want.
Errrrm I mentioned that the centre I work in offers emotional and physical health services, as well as some other things, so no, not just counselling. I thought I made that clear but there you go. And, me "judging", you sound biased yourself and therefore I can't take your feedback seriously at all. I stand by what I saiid.
LoulaBell you sound like you have some serious issues and you're not even reading any one else's posts correctly. People can have their own opinions but you are just angry and abusive. Take a chill!!
Well, I know a hell of a lot more sex workers than you do, so you better take your clothes off and start running.
Your uneducated guess about sex workers is completely wrong. The majority of them are perfectly happy with their careers and at ease with the work they do. It's very likely that the author's friend is also content with her choice of work, especially since that's what she said. Why would she lie to the author? You have no reason to think otherwise, but you automatically assume the friend is lying to the author because of your prejudice against sex workers.
Perhaps sex workers simply have fewer hangups about sex than you do, and that's why they are happy to do work that you have so much judgement about?